December 31, 2012
Summary: Teenagers are frolicking in California, like they’re in a Noxzema commercial. But they’re not – it’s just Cher Horowitz’s (Alicia Silverstone) life. She has an awesome wardrobe and picks out matches on a computer. Her father (Dan Hedaya) is a lawyer who fights with people for a living, but fights with Cher for free. He tells her Josh, her former stepbrother, is coming to town that night and will be having dinner with them.
Cher has a great Jeep she’s horrible at driving, and she doesn’t even have a license yet. Her best friend is Dionne (Stacey Dash); both of them were named after “great singers of the past who now do infomercials.” Dionne and her boyfriend Murray (Donald Faison) fight a lot, and Cher thinks they’re inspired by What’s Love Got to Do With It? Murray accuses Dionne of “jeeping” with other guys, so she accuses him of cheating on her, since she found an extension in his car. Cher doesn’t see the appeal of high school boys, which are like dogs.
Cher’s debate teacher Mr. Hall (Wallace Shawn) asks her and her rival Amber (Elisa Donovan) to hold a debate on immigration. Cher uses an analogy involving her father’s birthday party and rearranging chairs to make more room for unexpected guests. Also, “it does not say RSVP on the statue of liberty.” Amber doesn’t get it. Cher replies that it was her father’s 50th birthday.
Elton (Jeremy Sisto) has no comments on the debate but wants to go to the quad to find his missing Cranberries CD. Travis (Breckin Meyer) has learned that tolerance is good because he may not always like the music his future children will listen to. Mr. Hall hands out report cards (Travis tries to jump out the window), learning that one student, Christian, won’t be in class until the second half of the year. Cher is shocked that she got a C in debate.
Cher goes home to her gorgeous house, where a huge portrait of her late mother looks over the foyer. Josh (Paul Rudd) is home, and Cher tells him to go bug his new stepfamily. She also thinks he should go to school on the East Coast since girls there aren’t as particular about guys. Josh changes the TV from Beavis and Butthead to the news because he actually cares about the world. They eat dinner with Mr. Horowitz, who wants Josh to be a corporate lawyer instead of an environmental lawyer. Though at least Josh, unlike Cher, knows what he wants to do.
Mr. Horowitz asks Cher about her report card, but she isn’t ready for him to see it since she hasn’t finished negotiating her grades with her teachers. Josh is disgusted, but Cher has been successful with it every other semester. She gets her PE grade changed by complaining to her teacher about a mean boy. She gets another teacher, Ms. Geist (Twink Caplan), to change her grade by promising to write her congressman about violations of the Clean Air Act. But Mr. Hall won’t budge.
After school, Cher and Dionne head to the mall for retail therapy. Dionne thinks Mr. Hall is miserable and wants everyone else to be the same way. Cher decides that’s the place to start – get him laid. Too bad there aren’t any hot female teachers at school. Ms. Geist is the only possible option, and Cher decides not to discount her, despite her obvious flaws. She writes her a note containing a famous quote (from Cliff’s Notes) and leaves it and a rose in her box. Ms. Geist is touched.
Mr. Hall tells his students how many tardies they have to work off. Travis has the most, 38, and gives an acceptance speech thanking his parents, L.A.’s bus drivers, and McDonald’s for making Egg McMuffins. Cher has two tardies and gets one excused because she was “surfing the crimson wave.” She tells Mr. Hall that Ms. Geist was right about him – he’s the only one in the school with “any intelligence.”
At home, Mr. Horowitz confronts Cher over a notice for unpaid tickets. She’s forbidden to drive her Jeep without a licensed driver. (Dionne doesn’t count – “two permits do not equal a license.”) Cher charms Josh, who’s reading Nietzsche, into giving her a lesson, or maybe less charms him than bugs him until he gives in to shut her up.
He tells her he’s going to a Tree People meeting; they might get Marky Mark to plant a tree. Cher isn’t impressed, but Josh thinks he might want to use his celebrity for a good cause. Cher says she does nice things all the time, like donating outfits to their housekeeper, Lucy. Plus, she’s matchmaking for Mr. Hall and Ms. Geist. Josh says that’s probably more for Cher than for them. If she ever did anything that wasn’t 90 percent selfish, he’d die of shock. She says that would be enough of a motive for her.
At school, Cher asks Dionne if she would call her selfish. “Not to your face,” Dionne assures her. She guesses that Josh is making Cher feel bad about herself. They catch up with Mr. Hall and Cher gives him coffee, encouraging him to share it with Ms. Geist. They then visit Ms. Geist in the guidance office and try to give her a quickie makeover. Ms. Geist just wants them to sign up for the environmental fair.
The girls head to PE, where Cher hopes to work off the miniscule amount of food she’s eaten. They see Ms. Geist and Mr. Hall together and think they’re hitting it off. “Old people can be so sweet,” Cher says happily. Indeed, the teachers are involved, and Mr. Hall’s attitude in class improves. Everyone applauds Cher for making it happen. Her grades go up, and Mr. Horowitz is pleased that she was able to argue them better.
Cher’s so happy with herself that she feels like being benevolent to more people. This involves telling Dionne to take out her nose ring when her allergies act up. She complains to their PE teacher about the state of gym class, then almost gets hit by a tennis ball. Dionne gets out of tennis by turning in a note from her private instructor, who’s afraid gym class will interfere with his lessons. Amber’s plastic surgeon won’t let her participate in any activity where balls fly at her nose. “Well, there goes your social life,” Dionne remarks.
There’s a new student at school: Tai (Brittany Murphy, RIP). Amber immediately makes fun of her grungy clothes. Cher says Tai is clueless and they should make her over. Dionne disagrees; “she is toe up. Our stock would plummet.” Cher quickly befriends Tai, who’s looking for “herbal refreshment.” The girls tell her they don’t have tea, but she can get Coke. Tai’s impressed. They give her a quick tour of various cliques, sharing Cher’s choice not to date high school boys.
Murray comes by looking for money from Dionne, who he calls “woman.” She reminds him that she hates it when he calls her that. “Street slang is an increasingly valid form of expression. Most of the feminine pronouns do have mocking, but not necessarily misogynistic, undertones,” he replies. Tai’s impressed that people at the school talk like adults. Cher tells her it’s a really good school.
Tai goes to the cafeteria, where she meets Travis and bonds with him over their shared love of Marvin the Martian. When she tells Cher and Dionne about him, Cher cautions her not to get involved with someone who’s always high. Smoking pot at parties is okay, but no one respectable would date a pothead. She suggests a makeover, and Tai agrees to it, saying she’s never had straight friends before.
After school, Cher and Dionne wash the red dye out of Tai’s hair, then do her makeup and alter her clothes. Cher and Tai do Buns of Steel, and Cher teaches Tai the word “sporadically.” They’re also going to expand their reading horizons – Cher will read Fit or Fat? and Tai will read Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus. Josh comes home and Cher tells him she wants to do something good for humanity. He suggests sterilization. He’s impressed that she found someone more clueless than herself to rescue. Cher thinks she’s improving Tai’s life. Tai hopes to see Josh again, and “not sporadically.”
Back at school, Travis gives Tai a flyer for a party, but Dionne and Cher tell her it won’t be attended by anyone respectable. They think she has potential to be popular because she has something going for her that no one else does. Tai says she’s not a virgin, but Cher says their friendship will help her get any guy she wants. Like Elton, for example. Cher tries to get them together by getting them close while she’s taking pictures of her friends.
Dionne beeps Cher during dinner, telling her that Murray saw her picture of Tai in Elton’s locker. She thinks they should all go to the Valley party after all. Murray drives, fighting with Dionne over a map. Cher goes Tai pointers on leaving Elton wanting more, though Tai’s distracted by Travis’ skateboarding skills. She notices that Amber’s wearing the same dress Cher had on the day before. Cher’s evening gets worse when Travis spills beer on her shoes. He offers pot to make up for it.
The girls spot Elton and do the pretend-I-just-said-something-funny trick. It just confuses Travis, who doesn’t know what’s going on. Meanwhile, Murray’s friend is shaving Murray’s head, which Dionne flips out about. She threatens to call Murray’s mother. The rest of the partiers dance, and Tai is still drawn to Travis, whose idea of impressing her is jumping off of something really high. Cher pulls Tai away and gets her to dance to catch Elton’s attention. All she catches is a shoe to the head.
Elton and Cher tend to Tai, chasing away Travis. Cher tells Elton to ask questions to keep Tai conscious. Elton asks what seven times seven is. “Stuff she knows!” Cher exclaims. Once she’s recovered, Tai goes off to dance with Elton. Cher’s pleased with herself again, but not for long – her father wants her home in 20 minutes, unaware that she’s in the Valley, which is more than 20 minutes away.
Cher, Tai, and Elton leave the party together, and there’s some shuffling to decide who’s driving who home. Tai ends up with another classmate while Elton takes Cher. Cher wants to see Elton settle down, and he thinks she means with her, not Tai. He keeps trying to kiss her, but she fights him off and gets out of his car in a liquor store parking lot.
Elton ditches her, so Cher tries to call for a cab. Suddenly a guy puts a gun to her head and takes her money and phone, telling her to get on the ground. Cher objects – she’s wearing a designer dress. Finally she gets on the ground, and her mugger thanks her and leaves. Cher doesn’t want to call her father, so she calls Josh for a ride. He picks her up while discussing something scholastic with a date. The date and Cher end up disagreeing over who said “to thine own self be true.” (Cher is correct because she remembers Mel Gibson correctly.)
Even a massage doesn’t make Cher feel better, since she has to tell Tai that Elton doesn’t want to be with her. The two of them and Dionne ditch school to talk about boys and Cher’s virginity. “She’s saving herself for Luke Perry,” Dionne explains. Cher adds that she doesn’t want to have sex until she finds the right person. She’s picky enough about her shoes. Besides, Dionne is also (technically) a virgin. Tai gets emotional when she hears the song she and Elton danced to at the party.
Cher realizes she needs to find someone to take Elton’s place, but there aren’t many good choices at school. Until one day, when Christian (Justin Walker), shows up. Cher figures it’s okay to find her own guy while she’s looking for one for Tai. She gives an oral presentation in debate class about violence in the media, saying that there’s so much in the news that there’s no point in taking it out of TV shows. Amber again objects to Cher’s thought process, but Christian liked it.
Cher tries to make Christian interested by sending herself flowers, candy, and love letters. Eventually he asks her to do something with him. He comes to pick her up while Josh is helping Mr. Horowitz and a bunch of other lawyers with a big case. Mr. Horowitz slams Christian for being a Rat Pack wannabe. He also objects to Cher’s dress, which Josh thinks looks hot. He thinks he should follow them to the party to keep an eye on Cher.
At the party, Tai takes a spill down some stairs, then spots Elton dancing with Amber. Cher assures her that Amber isn’t that pretty; she’s a Monet. From far away, she looks pretty, but up close, she’s a mess. Tai messes with her outfit, then ends up dancing with Josh. At the end of the night, Josh drives Cher home, and she suggests that they take the lawyers food since they’ve been working so hard.
Cher tells us that sometimes she enjoys staying home more than partying, maybe because she gets to wear more comfortable clothes. (Also because she gets to watch Ren and Stimpy and joke around with Josh.) Josh’s mother calls but he doesn’t want to talk to her because he’ll have to go home for spring break. Cher invites him to stay with her and Mr. Horowitz over break. He accepts, though he can’t believe he’s listening to someone who watches cartoons. She tells him that Ren and Stimpy are “way existential.”
Christian calls and plans a night watching movies with Cher. She uses photos to pick out the perfect wardrobe, gets Dionne to do her makeup, and puts a tube of cookie dough in the oven because women should always have something baking when a man comes over. Cher thinks this might be the night she loses her virginity.
Cher suggests that she and Christian go swimming, but he’d rather watch Tony Curtis movies – Some Like it Hot and Spartacus (or, as Cher calls it, Sporadicus). During the movie, Cher tries to primp herself and look sexy but instead falls off the bed. Then she suggests wine or coffee. Christian starts seeing the light and makes up an excuse to leave.
Cher tells Dionne and Murray what happened while Murray gives Dionne a driving lesson. She’s coming to grips with the rejection, since Christian dresses better than she does: “What would I bring to the relationship?” Murray breaks the news that Christian is gay. Cher’s in disbelief, but Dionne notes that Christian likes to shop and dresses really well. Then she accidentally drives onto the freeway. Murray gets her to safety and they celebrate their brush with death by making out. Cher tells us that after that, Dionne was no longer a virgin, technical or otherwise.
Christian and Cher go shopping together at the mall while Tai flirts with some boys. They terrorize her by threatening to drop her over a balcony, and Christian comes to her rescue. Cher thinks that for a clueless girl, Tai’s good at being a damsel in distress. The story of Tai’s experience spreads through school (with a number of embellishments), and Cher tries to relate by talking about her mugging. No one cares. Also, now Tai is really popular and has no time for Cher or Travis.
Cher tries to get ready for her driving test but can’t find the white shirt she thinks makes her look responsible. She asks Lucy to talk to the gardener about something since Cher doesn’t speak Mexican. Lucy takes offense, and Josh explains that Lucy’s from El Salvador, not Mexico. Cher doesn’t get the difference. He points out that she gets upset if someone thinks she lives below Sunset.
The driving test doesn’t go well, partly because Cher’s a horrible driver and partly because she feels strange because she doesn’t like that Josh thinks she was mean to Lucy. The driving instructor ends the test early, and this time Cher can’t negotiate her way to a passing score. When she gets home, she’s disheartened to see Josh and Tai having fun together. Tai’s brought over things that remind her of Elton; she wants to burn them and move on. She’s found a new guy and wants Cher to help her land him. It’s Josh.
Cher feels even worse than before. She asks Tai if she’s sure she’s the right girl for Josh, since he’s such a brain. Tai thinks Cher is calling her stupid. She doesn’t know why she’s listening to Cher anyway: She’s “a virgin who can’t drive.” Cher admonishes that that was “way harsh.” She feels like she’s created a monster. She goes for a walk, lamenting all the things she’s done wrong and wondering why Tai likes Josh anyway. Then it hits her: She likes Josh, too.
Now Cher doesn’t know how to act, since her normal methods of getting a guy’s attention won’t work on Josh. She watches the news with him, confused about war in Bosnia because she thought peace was declared in the Middle East. Later, she helps Mr. Horowitz with his case and asks if he’s ever had a problem he couldn’t argue his way out of. She confides that she likes a boy who likes someone else. Mr. Horowitz says the guy must be an idiot. Cher says he’s not, but he makes her feel selfish. Her father points out all the ways she takes care of him and the house.
At school, Ms. Geist talks to the students about the Pismo Beach disaster, and Cher is suddenly inspired. She offers to help organize a relief effort. She starts by gathering canned goods, clothes, and various other things (like skis) from her own house, then getting people at school to sign up to donate belongings. Travis stops by to help and apologizes for ruining Cher’s shoes at the party. (The apology is part of a “club” he’s joined – a club that has 12 steps.) He invites her to a skating exhibition.
At the exhibition, Cher runs into Tai and the girls apologize to each other and make up. Cher sees that Tai and Travis really like each other, so Josh is no longer a factor. Back at home, Cher helps with the case again, but another lawyer gets mad at her for screwing something up and starts yelling. Josh defends her, but the lawyer accuses him of taking her side because of a crush.
Josh assures Cher that she didn’t screw anything up, then blasts the lawyer for making Cher worry. He encourages her to go do something fun instead of working. She thinks he only thinks she does superficial things and is “just a ditz with a credit card.” Josh tries to recover, saying Cher is young and beautiful. She’s touched by this. Josh says he’s only helping with the case because it’s a learning experience, and because Mel’s the only one who cares about him. Cher says that’s not true. Josh asks if she cares about him. She tries to pretend she was kidding around, but he kisses her.
Cut to a wedding – but not Josh and Cher’s. (She’s only 16, and they live in California, not Kentucky.) It’s Mr. Hall and Ms. Geist’s wedding, and Cher’s a bridesmaid. At the reception, Cher, Dionne, and Tai discuss their future weddings as Josh, Murray, and Travis try not to freak out. Josh encourages Cher to catch the bouquet since the guys have a pool going over whose girlfriend gets it. Cher succeeds, though she has to fight Amber for it.
Thoughts: ’90s music alerts: No Doubt, Cranberries, Counting Crows, Coolio. So, basically, all the ’90s music you can think of.
Trivia: Cher mispronouncing “Haitians” wasn’t scripted. Alicia Silverstone really didn’t know how to say it.
One of my proudest moments in life (and yes, this is pretty sad) was when I was in the car with someone who got in the wrong lane leaving a Metro station parking lot and I got to say Josh’s line: “Hey, James Bond, in America, we drive on the right side of the road.”
I love watching Donald Faison in this moving, then watching him on Scrubs. It’s funny to think of Murray and Turk being played by the same actor.
Remember when I said this super-special surprise was related to the new show I’ll be recapping soon? That’s not true. It was true, when I originally planned to recap something else for the super-special surprise. But at the last minute I saw that Clueless was on TV and jumped on it. For the record, my original super-special surprise was I Know What You Did Last Summer.
October 31, 2011
Summary: Casey Becker (Drew Barrymore) gets what she thinks is a wrong-number call, but after she hangs up, the caller calls back. This time he just wants to chat. Casey hangs up and goes to make some popcorn on the stove. The caller calls again and she tells him she’s about to watch a scary movie. “What’s your favorite scary movie?” he asks. Casey picks Halloween, then has to guess what the caller’s favorite horror movie is. She guesses Friday the 13th, saying only the first one was scary. The caller asks her name, saying he wants to know who he’s looking at.
Casey starts to get nervous, turning on the patio lights and locking the back door. She hangs up but the caller calls a fourth and fifth time. Now he’s angry and threatens to gut her like a fish if she hangs up again. He tells her they’re playing a game. Casey runs around the house, locking all the doors, and looks into the yard but can’t see anyone. She threatens to call the police, but the caller points out that they’re out in the middle of nowhere and the police would never make it in time. Casey asks what he wants, and he replies, “To see what your insides look like.”
The doorbell rings and Casey calls out asking who’s there. The caller calls again, telling her never to ask who’s there. (As if he would tell her anyway.) Casey claims her boyfriend’s on his way, but the caller isn’t intimidated. He asks Casey if her boyfriend’s name is Steve. He makes her turn on the patio lights, and now she can see Steve tied to a chair outside. She starts to go out to him, but the caller tells her not to. He tells her they’re going to play a game, and if she doesn’t play, Steve’s dead.
Casey turns off the light as the caller tells her she just has to answer one question. She gets the warm-up question right, the name of the killer in Halloween, but she mistakenly says Jason is the killer in Friday the 13th. (It was his mother. Uh, spoiler.) Casey will get another chance in the bonus round, but Steve’s time is up. After watching him die, Casey begs the caller to leave her alone. He says he will if she can answer his final question: Is he at the front door or the back door?
Casey grabs a letter opener as a chair is thrown through the patio door. She runs through the house, ignoring the fire that the popcorn has started in the kitchen. She sees a flash of black run through the house and sneaks outside, still carrying the phone. She peeks inside and sees a figure in black wearing a white mask. A car is coming up the road, and instead of running right toward it, Casey stays next to the house. She turns to see the figure in black standing right behind her.
The figure grabs Casey through the window, chasing her as she runs off and stabbing her in the chest. She tries to fight him off and get to the house, which her parents are just now entering. She’s too weak to call out, and the figure grabs her again as her parents go inside. Casey reaches up and pulls down the figure’s mask as he raises his knife to finish her off.
Casey’s parents panic over not being able to find her in the house, and her mother picks up the phone to call 911. Casey’s phone is still on, and her mother can hear her gasping for breath as her killer drags her across the lawn. Casey’s father tells her mother to drive to the neighbor’s house and call the police. She goes outside to do so and screams. Casey’s bloody corpse is hanging from a tree in the front yard.
Elsewhere, Sidney Prescott (Neve Campbell) is working at her computer in her bedroom. She goes to close her window and Billy Loomis (Skeet Ulrich) scares her from outside, making her scream. Sidney’s father comes to check on her, but she insists everything’s fine. Billy’s nowhere in sight. Mr. Prescott tells Sidney he’s going out of town for a few days, and after he leaves, Billy pops up from under the bed.
Billy tells Sidney he misses how their relationship used to be almost R-rated; now they’re more of an edited-for-TV version. They start making out, but Sidney stops them before they can go too far. As Billy exits through the window, Sidney offers him a PG-13 relationship, flashing him a breast.
The next morning, the police and press are swarming Sidney’s high school. Gale Weathers (Courteney Cox) is one of the reporters. Sidney meets up with her friend Tatum (Rose McGowan), who tells her that Casey and Steve were murdered. They police are investigating, saying it’s the worst crime their town, Woodsboro, has seen since… She trails off. Sidney is called out of class to meet with Sheriff Burke and Deputy Dewey Riley (David Arquette) in Principal Himbry’s (Henry Winkler) office in case she has any information that can help them.
At lunch, Sidney, Tatum, and Billy discuss the murders with Randy (Jamie Kennedy) and Stu (Matthew Lillard). They talk about whether a woman could have committed the crimes. Stu doesn’t spare any graphic details. Randy notes that Stu used to date Casey, so he could be considered a suspect, but Tatum says she was with Stu all evening. Randy also has an alibi, as he was working at a video store. Their joking around makes Sidney uncomfortable, and she walks off.
Sidney comes home from school to an empty house, since her dad’s out of town, and talks to Tatum on the phone. Sidney feels déjà vu from all the police and reporters being around. They make plans to meet up that evening, as Sidney’s going to spend the night at Tatum’s. She tries to watch TV, but everything she sees is about Casey and Steve. She also sees a report from Gale about Sidney’s mother, Maureen, who was raped and murdered a year ago.
Sidney lies down for a while, waking up after dark when the phone rings. It’s Tatum telling her she’s on her way. The phone rings again, but this time it’s Casey’s killer. Sidney thinks it’s Randy playing a trick on her. She scoffs at horror movies, saying they’re all about big-breasted girls who run upstairs when they should run out of the house. The caller tells her he’s not Randy and announces that he’s on the front porch.
Sidney heads for the window and doesn’t see anyone, so she opens the door and steps outside. The caller insists he’s there, so Sidney looks around, still not seeing anyone. She starts getting nervous, then realizes the caller’s bluffing. She pretends to pick her nose and asks what she’s doing, since the caller can supposedly see her. Sidney threatens to hang up, still thinking the caller is Randy, but he tells her he’ll kill her like her mother. She goes back inside, where a masked figure in black grabs her.
Ghostface and Sidney fight, and he threatens to cut her with the knife, but she gets away and goes upstairs (exactly what she said people shouldn’t do in horror movies). She uses her closet door to keep her bedroom door from opening all the way. Sidney tries to call the police, but the phone is off the hook. She instead uses the Internet to reach 911. Billy appears at the window and Sidney frantically tells him the killer’s in the house. As he comforts her, his cell phone falls to the floor.
Sidney runs downstairs and opens the front door, where Dewey is holding up the mask. They scream and scare each other. Billy’s arrested as he insists that he didn’t do anything. Tatum arrives and Dewey tries to get her to leave. In the process, they reveal that they’re siblings. Gale shows up but Tatum won’t tell her what happened. Gale takes her anger out on her cameraman, Kenny, for not moving fast enough.
Dewey tries to call Sidney’s father from the police station, but he’s not registered at the hotel where he’s supposedly staying. Burke interrogates Billy, whose father says they should call his cell phone company and check the phone records to see that Billy never called Sidney. Billy admits to stopping by Sidney’s house the night before, but insists he didn’t go to Casey’s and didn’t kill anyone. Burke says they’ll have to hold him until they get his phone records.
Gale goes to the police station to make a report as Billy is taken to lock-up. He tries to reach out to Sidney, but she ignores him. Burke tells Dewey that kids today are so messed-up that Billy could easily be a killer. Tatum bugs Dewey to let her take Sidney home, overriding his authority. The three try to sneak out the back door to avoid the press, an idea Gale has thought of as well. She meets them behind the station and tries to get Sidney to give her a soundbite. Instead, Sidney asks how her book is coming along, then punches her.
At the Rileys’, Tatum relives the moment triumphantly. She asks Sidney if she thinks Billy is guilty. Sidney points out that he was there. Mrs. Riley tells Sidney her father’s on the phone, but when Sidney picks it up, it’s Ghostface. He tells her she “fingered the wrong guy again.” He promises that she’ll get some answers soon.
The next morning, a news report explains that Sidney was the key witness against Cotton Weary (Liev Schreiber), her mother’s alleged killer. Dewey tells her that Billy was released, since he couldn’t have made the phone call to her at the Rileys’. The police are still going to look into any phone calls he made to Sidney and Casey earlier.
At school, Sidney’s harassed by another reporter (Linda Blair!), then asks Gale to talk to her, saying she owes Maureen. Gale notes that someone was going to write a book about Maureen’s murder. Sidney accuses her of making things up about the case. Gale replies that Sidney got what she wanted – Cotton in jail.
Sidney asks if Cotton has changed his story, and Gale says no. He still claims that he had a consensual sexual relationship with Maureen and left his coat at the Prescotts’ house. Sidney saw someone leave wearing the coat, and though she testified it was Cotton, Gale notes that it could have been anyone. She thinks Cotton was framed. Sidney tries to sound confident when she saw Cotton killed Maureen, but Gale can tell that she’s not so sure anymore. Gale also thinks Maureen’s murder is related to Casey and Steve’s.
Tatum takes Sidney to class, and Gale tells Kenny they need to get proof about the murders being connected. She knows how much saving Cotton from death row could help her book sales. Sidney asks Stu if Billy’s mad, which is kind of a dumb question. A guy runs through the hall in black, wearing the white mask, and upsets Sidney. She runs off, smacking into Billy, who thinks she still suspects him. He insists he’s innocent and scared off the real killer.
Sidney tells Billy that the killer called her, and he notes that it couldn’t have been him, since he was in lock-up. He wonders if she’s trying to come up with reasons not to sleep with him. Billy notes that things between them changed after Maureen died. Sidney can’t believe he’s so flippant about her mother’s death. Billy notes that it was a year ago (tomorrow); when his mom left him and his dad, he got over it pretty quickly. Sidney sarcastically tells him she’s sorry her life isn’t perfect enough for him.
Principal Himbry blasts the student who ran through the halls, as well as his coconspirators. He cuts up their mask and expels them. One of the students complains that he’s not being fair. Himbry says fair would be hanging them from a tree and exposing their insides. In the bathroom, Sidney overhears two girls accusing her of making things up for attention. One of them even thinks she’s the killer and killed Casey because she and Steve were having an affair. The other notes that Sidney has a boyfriend, and the first says she could be a slut like her mother.
After the girls leave, not realizing Sidney was in the bathroom with them, Sidney starts to get paranoid and makes sure she’s alone. She’s not: Ghostface is hiding in a stall. Sidney hightails it out before he can get to her. The police return to the school, which Gale is staking out, and she meets Dewey. She flirts with him, thinking he falls into her target demographic, 18-24. He’s immune to her charms.
Himbry announces that classes have been cancelled but there’s a citywide curfew starting at 9. Gale asks Dewey where Mr. Prescott is, wondering if he’s a suspect. He won’t give he any info but tells her she’s prettier in person. Gale’s pleased that he watches her show. “I’m 25. I was 24 for a whole year,” he replies.
Everyone leaves school early and Stu tells Sidney and Tatum he’s having a big party that night. Tatum talks Sidney into coming. Himbry plays around with the mask, then hears a knock at his office door. The only person around is a janitor (Wes Craven!) wearing a Freddy sweater. Himbry is overly jumpy and keeps scaring himself, but he’s still not prepared when Ghostface comes out from behind his door and kills him.
Tatum and Sidney discuss Gale’s claims; Sidney’s still in denial that Maureen could have had an affair with Cotton. She’s angry with Gale for spreading what she thinks are lies about her mom. Sidney’s nervous about the killer, and Tatum tells her to stop freaking herself out “like some Wes Carpenter film.”
Randy’s working at the video store, where he tells Stu he thinks Billy’s still a suspect. Stu finds it suspicious that Mr. Prescott is missing. Randy says he’s probably dead and his body will pop up in the final reel. He yells that there’s a simple formula for horror movies: “Everybody’s a suspect!” As he says that Mr. Prescott is a red herring and Billy is the killer, Billy arrives and asks how they know it isn’t Randy. Randy admits that he’d be a major suspect in a movie, even without a motive: “It’s the millennium. Motives are incidental.”
Woodsboro prepares for curfew as Dewey takes Sidney and Tatum downtown and stops by the police station. Tatum wonders who would play Sidney in a movie version of her life. Dewey suggests Meg Ryan, but Sidney thinks with her luck, she’d get Tori Spelling. As the girls shop for the party, they discuss Billy and his patience over Sidney’s hesitance to have sex with him. They don’t see Ghostface watching them from nearby.
Burke tells Dewey that the calls from Ghostface to Sidney were made from a phone registered to Mr. Prescott. He reminds Dewey that the next day is the anniversary of Maureen’s death. Burke decides to keep roadblocks and the curfew in effect while they try to find Mr. Prescott. He tells Dewey to stick close to Sidney. Dewey does so by…taking Sidney and Tatum to the party, then leaving. (Good job, Dewey.)
Gale also goes to the party, running into Dewey outside and telling him she wants to be around in case a story breaks. He’s actually sticking around to keep an eye on things. Gale takes advantage of this to get access to the house, taking a camera with her. Randy has brought a bunch of horror movies, many of them featuring Jamie Lee Curtis. Stu sends Tatum to get him a beer as he answers the door and lets Dewey and Gale in. Dewey proves again to be a bad cop when he lets the kids keep drinking. Gale places her camera on top of the VCR without anyone seeing.
Tatum goes to the garage for beer and gets spooked by a cat. As she’s heading back into the house, the lights go out and Tatum realizes the door is locked. She opens the garage door, but it only goes up a little, then goes back down, thanks to Ghostface. Tatum thinks it’s Randy, telling him Sidney will freak out if she sees him. She asks if he wants to “play psycho killer,” asking if she can be the victim. Ghostface definitely wants to play, and he’s brought his knife along to prove it.
Tatum tries to make a run for it, using the beer bottles to buy her some time. The garage door is still closed, so she tries to make it out the doggy door. She gets stuck and Ghostface sends the door up, killing her. Inside, the party breaks up, with only Sidney and Stu remaining. Billy shows up and Stu sends him and Sidney upstairs to talk or…not talk. Randy reappears, upset that Billy came back and ruined his chances to hook up with Sidney.
Gale goes back to her van, where Kenny’s already watching her slightly delayed footage from the party. Inside the house, Billy apologizes to Sidney for being selfish, though she admits she’s the one who’s been a jerk. She knows she can’t remain in denial about Maureen forever, and she can’t stop hiding behind her death. Sidney’s afraid she’ll turn out like her mother. Billy compares her situation to Jodie Foster flashing back to her dead father in Silence of the Lambs. Sidney notes that this is her life, not a movie. Billy tells her it’s all one big movie. They start making out, then more.
Downstairs, Randy and a bunch of people watch Halloween, and Randy gives everyone a lesson on horror movies. Rule #1: No sex. Rule #2: No drinking or doing drugs. Rule #3: Never say, “I’ll be right back.” Stu breaks the second two rules by heading outside for another beer and telling everyone he’ll be right back. Dewey gets Gale from the van, telling her that someone reported a car in the bushes down the road. As she leaves Kenny, she tells him she’ll be right back.
As Sidney and Billy get it on upstairs, Randy gets a phone call telling him that Principal Himbry was found dead, his body hanging from the goalposts on the football field. The last remaining partygoers (minus Stu, Randy, and the lovebirds) drive off to go cut him down. Gale and Dewey flirt as they walk down the road, then have to jump out of the way of the speeding partygoers. Dewey winds up on top of Gale and they kiss. They come across the car, which Dewey recognizes as Mr. Prescott’s, and run back to the house to get Sidney.
Post-coitus, Sidney asks Billy who he used his one phone call to contact when he was arrested. He says he called his father, but she knows Burke called him. Billy says no one answered when he called. He asks if Sidney still thinks he’s a suspect, and she assures him she doesn’t, she just thinks it would have been clever of him to use his one call to contact her. Billy angrily asks what he has to do to prove he’s not the killer. Well, getting stabbed by Ghostface would do it, which is exactly what happens.
Ghostface goes after Sidney next, chasing her through the house and trapping her in a bedroom. She spots Kenny’s van outside and yells for help, but no one hears her. As Ghostface tries to get into the room, Sidney starts to go out the window. She fights Ghostface off, falling onto a boat in the driveway. From there, she can see Tatum’s dead body hanging from the garage door. Randy drunkenly watches Halloween by himself, yelling for Jamie Lee Curtis to look behind her. He should really be looking behind himself, since Ghostface is there.
Sidney makes it to the van, where she and Kenny watch Ghostface approach Randy 30 seconds after the fact. They get out of the van to go up to the house, but Ghostface is waiting and stabs Kenny. He gets Sidney in the shoulder, but she’s able to escape by going back into the van and crawling out the back. She hops a fence and runs off as Dewey and Gale return to the house. Dewey heads inside, telling Gale to call Burke for backup.
Inside the house, Dewey hears screams and calls out for Mr. Prescott. The screams are actually from the movie. Gale runs to the van to get Kenny’s phone and sees puddles of blood. She calls 911, getting spooked when Randy pops up outside the car. She hits him with the phone and starts to drive off, but the windshield is covered in blood. That’s because Kenny’s dead body is on the roof of the van. Gale manages to throw him off, but as she’s driving away, she swerves to miss hitting Sidney and hits a tree instead.
Sidney heads back to the house, yelling for Dewey, who stumbles out the front door. He’s been stabbed in the back. Ghostface is right behind him. He chases Sidney to Dewey’s car, which she locks herself inside. Too bad he has the keys. Ghostface ducks down so Sidney can’t see and unlocks the back of the jeep. The radio goes off and Sidney uses it to call for help. Ghostface attacks but Sidney gets away again, heading back to the house.
Randy and Stu approach and Sidney grabs Dewey’s gun. The guys each tell Sidney the other is the killer, but she can’t decide which of them to trust, so she locks them both out of the house. Upstairs, a bloody Billy stumbles out of the bedroom and falls down the steps. He gets Sidney to give him Dewey’s gun, then opens the door and lets Randy in. Randy tells him Stu’s gone crazy, to which Stu replies, “We all go a little mad sometimes” before shooting Randy.
Stu licks his fingers, letting Sidney know that his “blood” is corn syrup. Stu comes in through another door with the voice modulator used to create Ghostface’s voice. The guys corner Sidney in the kitchen, telling her she needs to answer a question. First she has her own question: Why did they kill Maureen? Billy denies that they need a motive, saying it’s scarier without one. Maureen was a whore and they put her out of her misery. Billy reveals that Maureen was having an affair with his mother, which is why his mom left town. Stu notes that Sidney’s no longer a virgin, so she can die.
As Stu ducks out of the room (saying he’ll be right back), Billy tells Sidney it’s after midnight, so it’s officially the anniversary of her mother’s death. Stu returns with Mr. Prescott, planting a cell phone and the voice modulator on him. The guys do that stupid-villain-who-talks-too-much thing, explaining that they’re going to make it look like Mr. Prescott snapped, killed a bunch of people (including Sidney), and committed suicide.
First they have to make it look like they’re victims, so Billy stabs Stu. Stu repays him in kind, but not as gently as Billy would have liked. Sidney and Mr. Prescott communicate with their eyes as Stu says they’re going to survive to plan a sequel. Sidney calls them crazy, and Billy tells her, “Movies don’t create psychos. Movies make psychos more creative.” He orders Stu to get the gun, but it’s missing. Gale has arrived and grabbed herself a weapon. She doesn’t move fast enough, though, since Billy’s able to get the gun back, shove her outside, and knock her out. Billy’s about to shoot Gale when Stu realizes that Sidney and her father are gone.
The phone rings – it’s Sidney, taunting Billy that she called the police. Billy leaves the phone with Stu, who’s losing a lot of blood, and Sidney asks for his motive. Stu blames peer pressure. Billy freaks out, ripping up pillows in the living room as Stu cries that his parents are going to be mad at him. Billy goes back through the house, looking for Sidney, who’s now in the Ghostface outfit. She jumps out of a closet and stabs him with an umbrella. Stu runs in and attacks her, but she fights him off, hitting him with a vase, then pushing the TV over on his head.
As she goes back to where Billy’s lying and picks up the Ghostface mask, Randy reappears, saying he’s never been so happy to be a virgin. Billy pops up with the knife and tells Sidney to say hello to her mother. She puts her finger in one of his stab wounds, which just makes him angrier. Before he can bring the knife down, he’s shot by Gale. Randy warns that this is usually the part of the horror movie where the killer comes back to life for one last scare. Billy sits up and Sidney quickly shoots him, saying, “Not in my movie.”
Mr. Prescott comes in with a crash and finally gets untied. As the sun comes up and the paramedics take Dewey away, Gale gets to give an eyewitness account of what happened.
Thoughts: I just had to do this for Halloween. I’ll do the second and third ones some other time (even though the third one isn’t actually from the ’90s). Probably not the fourth, though, since it doesn’t really fit with the first three.
I wonder what Billy would say about the fact that I did this post off of an edited-for-TV version of the movie. (Hey, it’s been on MTV, like, ten times this month. I took advantage of it.) I think the language is the only thing they edited, anyway. I’m pretty sure they didn’t take any scenes out, and I’ve seen the movie enough times that I probably would have noticed if they had.
This is the only movie where I can tolerate Matthew Lillard. However, he did a really good job in an episode of House he was in last year, and it was all dramatic.
What’s with Kevin Williamson having people go through each other’s windows? Do they not have doors where he grew up?
The party is kind of confusing. It seems to break up twice. But apparently it was filmed over 21 days, so the continuity problems can be forgiven.
I never realized that the scene where Ghostface chases Sidney through Stu’s house after “stabbing” Billy is a big hint as to his identity. The house is big and has a number of doors and hallways, but Ghostface knows his way around. This makes sense, since it’s his house.
I’ve always loved the inside joke of Randy yelling for Jamie Lee Curtis to turn around, calling her Jamie, which is the actor’s name.
Kenny’s “cellular” is a Zack Morris phone. Hee.
I found some great trivia about the movie, some of which I didn’t know before:
- Wes Craven got Drew Barrymore to cry by telling her tales of animal cruelty.
- The MPAA wanted Craven to edit Drew’s death scene because it was too graphic, but he lied that they only had one take of it.
- Bob Weinstein told Craven to kill off Himbry because there are 30 pages of script where no one dies.
- Ghostface was originally supposed to wear white, but people thought he might look like a member of the KKK.
- The person playing Ghostface when he sneaks up behind Randy is actually Skeet, who asked to do a scene where he wears the costume.
- Dewey was originally supposed to die, but Craven filmed the scene where he’s conscious and being taken away by the paramedics in case he changed his mind about killing him off.
October 10, 2011
Summary: A James Earl Jones wannabe tells us that since the dawn of time, the Slayer has been responsible for protecting people from evil, while being looked over by a Watcher. In the Dark Ages, a Slayer gets a weapon from her Watcher. Buffy (Kristy Swanson) and her fellow cheerleaders perform at a basketball game at their high school. Later, Buffy and three of her friends (one of whom is Kimberly, played by Hilary Swank) go to the mall and Buffy complains about a history test she didn’t do well on. They discuss going to a movie and use slang like “stale” and “bogus.”
Merrick (Donald Sutherland) tries to get in an elevator with the girls, who make fun of his clothes and think he’s homeless. Buffy’s friends think she’s lucky because her parents are always going away for the weekend. They talk through a movie while Benny (David Arquette) and Pike (Luke Perry) complain about them. After the movie, Buffy meets up with a guy named Jeff who’s going to meet her at her house that night. Meanwhile, their friend Ben goes by a carnival and gets killed by Amilyn (Paul Reubens). Buffy’s flighty parents leave for the weekend while Buffy and Jeff make out in the living room.
Back in what looks like Elizabethan times, a Slayer fights off some bad guys but gets captured. Buffy wakes up from her dream about this as some ancient creature is almost brought back to life. At school, Buffy and her friends discuss themes for a school dance, settling on the environment. Principal Murray (Stephen Root) sends them to class. They continue the conversation at some teen hangout that night and Buffy officially meets Pike and Benny. Benny gets all sexual-harassy on Buffy. The guys end up by the side of a road, where Amilyn finds them and bites Benny. Merrick shows up and takes a totally out-of-it Pike away.
Buffy stays behind after a cheerleading practice and does some gymnastics while Merrick watches. He tells her he’s been looking for her everywhere because he wanted to bring her her birthright. She’ll have to come with him to a graveyard to get it. Buffy’s not too bright, but she’s at least smart enough to know better than to go to a cemetery with a creepy old man. Merrick tells her she’s “chosen” and has to help stop the vampires. She asks if Elvis talks to him. Merrick notices that she has a birthmark and calls it the Sign of the Covenant.
Merrick asks if Buffy ever has dreams about being someone else. He guesses what some of them are, even though she’s never told anyone about them. He tells her this has to do with her birthright, and he’s part of it. Buffy agrees to go to the cemetery with Merrick and he takes her to the grave of a guy named Robert Berman who died three days earlier. He gives her a stake and tells her to watch. They’re waiting for Robert to wake up. “Do you have any gum?” Buffy asks. Meanwhile, her friend Cassandra is totally in danger.
Robert comes out of his grave and Merrick goes after him with a stake. He’s really bad at this. Another supposedly dead person comes out of a grave and Buffy fights her off as Merrick struggles with Robert. Buffy winds up staking both vampires. Benny, now with fangs, comes to see Pike and asks to be invited in. Pike notices that he looks bad. Oh, and he can fly now, so there’s that. Merrick drives Buffy home and tells her to act normal when she goes to school the next day. When the vampires find out who she is, they’ll come after her. He gives her an address and tells her to meet him after school, though she has practice. Buffy clarifies that vampires can’t come in unless invited.
Buffy comes home late and her mother doesn’t notice that she’s dirty and bloody. She dreams about going to bed with Lothos (Rutger Hauer) in a room that’s definitely not her room. Amilyn takes Cassandra to the place where he’s been trying to raise Lothos, who seems to have been completed restored. Merrick stalks Buffy at school, mad that she didn’t meet him. She tells him he’s wrong about her being the girl he’s been looking for. He pretends to accept this, then throws a knife at her. She catches it and he notes that only the chosen one could have done that.
Buffy tells Merrick that all she wants to do is graduate, go to Europe, marry Christian Slater, and die. She asks if he knew she was sitting on a fresh grave the night before. When he confirms this, she punches him in the face, pleased to see that she didn’t even break a nail. Cue a training montage with a punching bag, tires, rope, and stakes. Also, lots of neon and leggings. Later, Merrick asks Buffy how Lothos makes her feel in her dreams. She admits to being scared.
Principal Murray summons Buffy to his office, thinking she’s on drugs. She spits a jelly bean at a spider and pins it to the wall. Pike works on a van at a garage, telling his mechanic boss that something weird is going on in town and he should get out. He also mentions that something weird is going on with Benny. Buffy walks home alone at night and runs into a vampire. She uses her new Slayer skills to fight and kill him. It was actually a trap, and Merrick warns Buffy not to get herself into trouble with multiple vampires.
Buffy’s been having cramps, which Merrick says is a natural Slayer reaction to unnatural vampires. This should help her track them. Buffy’s upset that she’s risking her life while Merrick does nothing. He tells her he’s trained a ton of girls and isn’t allowed to interfere, no matter how exceptional his Slayer is. Buffy wonders if he has to keep being a Watcher until there are no more vampires. She assures Merrick that her keen fashion sense will keep her alive. He sarcastically comments that all vampires should beware, and she teases him about cracking a joke.
Pike’s van breaks down, but it’s okay because some friendly guys with fangs are coming along to help him. Oh, wait, one of them is Amilyn. Pike tries to lose him but Amilyn has a tight grip on the front of the van. He climbs up to the roof and punches through it, trying to grab Pike. He falls off when he’s hit with a branch, losing an arm in the process. Pike crashes into a tree and has to ditch the van. Amilyn’s mad that Pike tore his new jacket and tells his minions, “Kill him a lot.” Pike starts fighting them, then is joined by Buffy, who kills the two minions.
Merrick shows up as well and Pike recognizes him before passing out. Buffy takes Pike to her place and confirms his suspicions that the minions were vampires. He tells her one of his friends is, too. Buffy confides in Pike that her whole life has changed in three weeks, and everything she thought was important before now seems stupid. She invites him to sleep in the guest room, but he wants to stay in the living room and make sure the sun comes up. Lothos blasts Amilyn for leaving Buffy and Pike behind. Amilyn is so incompetent that Lothos isn’t sure how he made it through the Crusades. Then he goes to eat a cat.
At school, Buffy’s friends discuss Cassandra but aren’t entirely broken up about her death. A jock grabs Buffy’s butt, so she attacks him up. Later, she complains to Merrick about her slaying interfering with her cheerleading. He comes to a basketball game, where Buffy’s the only person who notices that one of the players is now a vampire. A ref tries to get him kicked out of the game for floating. The other players won’t play defense against him because he’s weird. (“He has no concept of zones,” one of them remarks.) Even Ben Affleck is freaked out. (No, seriously, Ben Affleck is in this movie.)
Buffy trips the player and faces off with him, making him run off. She chases after him, telling Merrick that the vampire knows who she is. She gets hassled by some bikers, beats on one, takes his motorcycle, and keeps chasing the vampire. The vamp loses her by jumping over a fence, but Pike sees Buffy riding by and goes after her on his own bike. They wind up at a spot where parade floats are stored, and the vamp uses one to run Buffy down. She tries to remind him who she is, since they used to be friends. A couple of vamp minions grab her, but before the vamp can bite her, Pike stakes him. Together, Buffy and Pike kill the minions, then almost make out.
Lothos and Amilyn appear, and Pike wants to run but Buffy’s entranced by Lothos. Merrick shows up as well and Lothos asks if he’s finally brought someone worthy. He starts to bite Buffy, but Merrick stops him. He starts to stake Lothos, who stabs him with his own weapon. Lothos and Amilyn leave as Lothos doesn’t think Buffy’s ready. A dying Merrick tells Buffy that she does everything wrong, but that’s good. “When the music stops, the rest is silence,” he says. Then he dies.
The next day, Buffy’s friends discuss her sudden disappearance from the game. She shows up and tells them she met an older guy a few weeks ago. They think she’s having an affair. Buffy asks them if they’ve noticed weird things going on. They tease her for hanging out with Pike and ask why she keeps blowing off all of her activities. Buffy blasts them for being so excited for a school dance. That night, Pike tracks her down as she’s out looking for a dress for the dance. He doesn’t understand why she’s going when the world is under attack. She blames herself for Merrick’s death. “I’m the chosen one, and I choose to be shopping,” she says. Benny overhears this.
The news spreads to Amilyn and Lothos, who plan to go after Buffy on Saturday, the day of the dance. Pike whittles stakes and makes himself look pretty while Buffy picks out a dress. On Saturday, everyone gets ’90s-glammed-up and dances. Buffy arrives in a white dress and looks for Jeff, who’s come with another girl, one of Buffy’s friends. He left her a break-up message on her answering machine. Pike arrives and dances with Buffy. He tells her she’s not like other girls, but she says she is. They finally make out.
Vampires attack, and Buffy tells everyone they can’t come in unless they’re invited. Kimberly says she already invited them – “they’re seniors!” Fortunately, Buffy has a bag of weapons and is ready to fight. Pike gives her his leather jacket, for some reason. Despite the fact that there are 20 vampires (I’m pretty sure one of them is Seth Green) and just Buffy fighting them, she doesn’t get killed. Pike isn’t very good at protecting the kids in the gym, though. Amilyn finds Buffy, who mocks his hair and tries to hide from him. Benny attacks Pike, offering to turn him into a vampire.
Amilyn tracks down Buffy (which isn’t a surprise, since she didn’t do a very good job of hiding) and warns that he’s immortal and can do anything. Lothos appears, playing a violin; hilariously, he brought a metronome with him. Buffy uses the distraction to her advantage and stakes Amilyn. “You’re going to wish you’d died,” he says, then takes approximately five minutes to die. Lothos notes that Amilyn was Buffy’s first real kill, and Lothos’ last gift to her. In the gym, Pike throws holy water in Benny’s face. Lothos tilts Buffy’s head and tells her it’s “time to put away childish things.”
Suddenly everything is quiet, and Buffy remembers what Merrick said about silence. She tells Lothos it’s too late. “You and I are one,” he says – they’re joined. She fights him and he says she’s just like all the other girls. Buffy holds up a cross, lights it on fire, and uses hairspray to ignite it and burn Lothos. In the gym, the principal hands out detentions and knocks out Kimberly for freaking out. Buffy returns and tells someone to find Pike.
Lothos arrives with a big sword, telling Buffy that she’s his destiny, so he could never hurt her. Instead, he’s going to kill everyone else. Buffy grabs a flag and uses the pole for a sword fight. Just as Lothos is about to finish her off, Pike attacks him and gets his attention off of Buffy. She uses a wooden chair to fend off Lothos’ sword, and when the sword breaks it, she uses a piece to stake him. Buffy revives a dazed Pike and confirms that they’ve won the battle. They dance, then ride off on his motorcycle.
Thoughts: If I hadn’t been recapping this movie, I wouldn’t have watched all of it. It is so, so bad. Like, Karen Brewer levels of annoying. Everyone in this movie could do better. Okay, maybe not David Arquette. I think the biggest problem is the camp factor. Everything that’s supposed to be serious can’t be taken seriously. The series is much darker, and its funny moments are funnier.
Kristy Swanson makes a pretty good Buffy, but I don’t think she could have handled it on the show. Sarah Michelle Gellar IS Buffy.
The dreams about past Slayers don’t come up in the series until the last season of the show, I think. At least I don’t remember Buffy mentioning them before that.
Merrick sucks as a Watcher. Giles FTW!
Hee, “kill him a lot” made me laugh out loud. I think that was the only part that did.
I think I have a crush on Luke Perry now.
October 7, 2011
The results are in, and with 21% of the votes, the winner of the Which Movie Should Jenn Recap First? poll is…
Buffy the Vampire Slayer!
Interestingly, all of the movies got at least one vote. 10 Things I Hate About You was the early favorite, and I thought it would win, but it ended up tying for second place with Cruel Intentions. I hope to eventually get to all the movies, and I’ll run more polls in the future to help me decide which to recap when.
Thanks to everyone who voted! You have amazing timing, as AMC is showing Buffy in the middle of the night. My DVR is all excited.
October 4, 2011
I want to recap a movie. I just can’t decide which one to start with. So take a look at the options below and let me know what you’d like to see. You can also leave suggestions in the comments, if you want.
A couple of guidelines:
- The movie has to be from the ’90s, obviously.
- The movie also has to be set in the ’90s. There has to be something…’90s-ish about it. So while I’d like to recap something like Newsies, it doesn’t really make sense.
- Movies that include Dawson’s Creek or Beverly Hills, 90210 actors are a plus.
- I’m trying to stick with the theme of most of what I cover on this blog: teenagers and college students. I really wanted to put Speed on the list, but it doesn’t quite fit.
- I didn’t put The Baby-sitters Club movie on the list because it’s a given. I’ll get there someday.
Vote! Vote now!