August 21, 2010

SVH #56, Lost at Sea: With Jessica as the Movie Star and Winston as the Professor

Posted in books tagged , , at 5:10 pm by Jenn

Kate Austen would beat the crap out of Jessica

Summary: On the way home from a school trip to an island, the boat carrying a bunch of SVH students capsizes and they have to bail out into lifeboats. Jessica and Winston wind up together, and when their lifeboat goes under, they’re both…well, lost at sea, like the title says. They end up on a deserted island together and proceed to have a Gilligan’s Island/Lost/Survivor/that episode of The Simpsons based on Lord of the Flies experience.

Winston, who you’d think would be like Gilligan, is actually more like the Professor – he takes care of his and Jessica’s basic needs and makes sure she’s not just sitting around, tanning. She, in turn, treats him like crap and hopes to become famous once she’s back home. After a run-in with a bear (yes, really), which Jessica handles better than Winston, they bond a little and Jessica realizes that Winston isn’t such a goofball after all. Then they get rescued. By…Moe. Okay, no, by a guy in a helicopter. Oh, and they were only stranded for 24 hours. Whoopee. Back in Sweet Valley, Jessica takes credit for everything that Winston did to take care of them on the island. And he lets her. Oh, WINSTON.

Thoughts: Jessica’s chemistry teacher lets her get extra credit by going on a marine biology field trip. Or the ghost writer screwed up when she set up this book at the end of the last one and couldn’t think of a better solution.

Wait, Lois is overweight and her mother’s the school dietician? The ghostwriter understands irony?

Jessica’s teacher calls her intelligent. Clearly he hasn’t learned how to tell the twins apart.

Elizabeth comforts a guilty-feeling Lila by telling her Jessica’s probably stolen as many boys from Lila as Lila has from her. Ha, awesome.

Jeffrey ditches Elizabeth to go study while she’s waiting for news about Jessica. I know he doesn’t like Jess, but he could try a little harder to hide it. Also, Elizabeth goes to school the day after the boating excursion, despite not knowing whether Jessica’s alive or dead. I know she’s a good student, but COME ON.

If I’m ever stranded on an island, I want Winston with me. He finds food, he grabs the First Aid kit from the lifeboat, and he uses a Swiss army knife as a reflective signaling device. He would have kicked butt on Lost. Jessica, on the other hand, would have been the Shannon.

Roger and Olivia broke up? When? Did I miss something? (Well, obviously.)


  1. notemily said,

    Hah, Jessica is SO the Shannon. “Lightsticks? What does that even mean?”

  2. leila said,

    She IS the Shannon. I remember in #13 “Kidnapped!” there was even that really weird scene where Jessica’s brother was hot for her.

    Also, if there were a way to disprove natural selection, this series would be it.

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