October 28, 2012
BH90210 4.22, Change Partners: Fatal Attraction
Summary: A dog wanders around the CU campus, following Brenda and Donna into a building. Brandon and Kelly discuss their upcoming retreat with the dean, chancellor, and leadership group. Then she heads off to Lucinda’s class to discuss monogamy. Brandon hangs a Barbarella poster in Steve’s dorm room (formerly Andrea’s dorm room), which a couple of his brothers, Muntz and Artie, would like to borrow sometime. The RA, Kathy, complains about the noise and warns Steve not to turn the floor into “the KEG house annex.”
Dylan arrives during Lucinda’s class discussion about serial monogamy and hears Kelly talk about how it’s having a different sexual partner at different stages in your life. He’s looked over Lucinda’s grant proposal and wants to view the documentary. Lucinda agrees to screen it for him the next day, while Kelly and Brandon are away. The dog follows Brenda and Donna again as they discuss their relationship issues. Brenda wishes she hadn’t told Dylan she’s still in love with him. Donna spots the dog, who wants to go for a ride in Donna’s car.
At the Peach Pit, Andrea relays a message from Kathy repeating that Steve can’t turn her room into a new KEG house. He’s not allowed to let any more frat brothers visit. Andrea shares ultrasound pictures with Brenda and Donna, then tells them she’s gotten a weekend job at the campus’ research lab. Suddenly the dog shows up, and Brenda and Donna start fighting over who will keep him. Donna winds up with him. This is boring.
Brandon hangs out at Lucinda’s house, calling her “babe,” because he’s totally that guy. He’s not that happy to hear that she’ll be spending part of the weekend with Dylan. She points out that she doesn’t get jealous of him spending time with Kelly. Whatever, it’s a stupid fight and I hate them both. At the beach apartment, Donna decides to name the dog Rocky since he likes listening to David play Rachmaninoff. Kelly tells her not to get too attached. David notices weird shaved shots on his chest. (Rocky’s, not his own.)
Brandon packs for the retreat, telling Jim and Cindy about Kelly’s role as his “date.” Donna and Kelly have brought the dog over to see the Walshes, for some reason. Donna shows them the shaved spots, and Jim says Rocky might have had surgery. Muntz visits Steve, who tries to keep him quiet. Muntz would like to bring his girlfriend by to take advantage of the single room. (Apparently they’ve been dating for two years and she’s just now willing to sleep with him.) Steve doesn’t think they’ll be quiet enough.
The retreat takes place at some outdoorsy place; the boys and girls will be in separate cabins and there will be a square dance. Brandon and Kelly reunite with Chancellor Arnold and meet his daughter Clare, who will be in Kelly’s cabin and who is the complete opposite of happy to be there. Dylan watches Lucinda’s film and they have a boring conversation about happiness. She offers to cook him dinner.
Brandon learns that his cabinmate is snoopy Condor reporter Josh. He’s done interviewing Brandon’s friends and is ready to talk to Brandon himself. First Josh wants to know how he got Professor Randall to drop the breaking-and-entering charges against Steve. Brandon says Randall just cut Steve some slack because Brandon tutored D’Shawn. Josh asks about his relationship with Lucinda and whether he had anything to do with her divorce from Randall. Brandon won’t answer that.
Lucinda lights candles for earth, water, animals, and people, boring both Dylan and me. She’s glad Kelly introduced them and would like to express her gratitude by sleeping with Dylan. She kisses him, but he’s not really into it. Out in nature or whatever, Kelly reminds Brandon that he has nothing to hide, so he shouldn’t worry about Josh. Brandon admits that he’s dating Lucinda, in a sense. Kelly’s impressed, for some reason. Josh approaches them and they run off.
Donna and Brenda take Rocky to a vet and learn that he came from CU’s research lab. He was probably freed and could be sick. They’ll have to notify the lab that they have him. The girls decide to let Andrea know. Brandon actually participates in the retreat square dance, first dancing with Kelly, then Clare. Once he gets back to Kelly, she warns that Josh is still out for blood, and also can’t dance. Brandon says Clare’s okay but may have tried to grope him.
Kelly teases that Lucinda will be jealous, and she’s never had a reason to be before because there was no competition. She’s also surprised that he’s dancing. Brandon says this type of dancing is easy because it’s just following directions, like making macaroni and cheese. He recalls that the last time they danced was at the spring dance, when he told her they could never be together because she’s like a sister to him. Kelly notes that he also told her he’d be in love with her if they were strangers.
Andrea heads to her dorm room (even though she has an apartment – I still don’t get it) and catches Muntz and his girlfriend in bed. She barely keeps Kathy from seeing them. She starts to yell at Steve, who says Muntz stood up for him when Sears tried to get him kicked out of KEG. Andrea doesn’t care, and she wants Steve out of her room by the next morning. Kelly and Brandon take a walk, talking about how Brandon prefers dancing with Kelly to sneaking around with Lucinda. He assures her it’s not a pickup line and they kiss.
Dylan works at the Peach Pit, reluctantly talking to Lucinda, who wishes he would be nicer since they almost made out and all. He regrets spending time with her at all. He thinks she wants to sleep with him to get him to finance the film. Lucinda swears that she’s really attracted to him. Dylan acknowledges that his wealth is rather attractive. Andrea goes to her supposed-to-be-empty dorm room, but Steve won’t let her in. She yells that she won’t let Kathy take away her room. But Steve has solved their problems by sleeping with Kathy.
As everyone gets ready to leave the retreat, Clare tells Kelly that Brandon is hot, asking how he is in bed. When he joins them, she kisses him European-style and speaks French to him. Kelly tells Brandon that she’s not necessarily upset about their kissage, but it can’t happen again. He teases that she needs to make herself “less irresistible” next time.
As Donna and Brenda take Rocky to the lab, they encounter some animal-rights protestors who ask them to sign a petition. Andrea interrupts and the protestors chastise her for taking the dog back for more testing. Donna starts to get cold feet about giving Rocky up. Andrea makes her choose who to believe, and Donna chooses her. Then she and Brenda sign the petition.
Everyone gathers at the beach apartment and gives a PSA about animal rights. Then Andrea and Jesse show up with Rocky (and Donna and Brenda are happier to see him than they are to see their friends). David asks if that level of attention makes Brandon want to grow fur. Brandon genuinely makes me laugh by saying, “No.” Dylan tells Kelly that Lucinda didn’t convince him to give her any money, so Kelly decides she’ll have to change his mind. Brandon doesn’t want to see their PDAs, so he goes to Lucinda’s house.
Thoughts: Alternate title: “Keep It In Your Pants, Brandon.”
What’s with Brenda and stray dogs? And I don’t mean Dylan. (Hi-yo!)
Donna tries to feed the dog something from a plastic bag, but he can’t get his head into it, and she doesn’t just take anything out of the bag. So the poor dog thinks he’s getting something to eat, but Tori Spelling fakes him out.
You’d think Brandon and Lucinda’s relationship would be better since they totally deserve each other.
Thanks, Clare, for making me throw up.
I get Brandon not wanting to say anything to Dylan about what happened with Kelly, but I’m surprised Dylan doesn’t tell Brandon that Lucinda came on to him. Wouldn’t that be the honorable thing to do?