January 26, 2013

Party of Five 1.4, Worth Waiting For: Access Denied

Posted in TV tagged , , , , , , at 5:15 pm by Jenn

Michael Goorjian, I would never friendzone you

Michael Goorjian, I would never friendzone you

Summary: Claudia has some questions for Julia about breast development. Thank you, Claudia. Julia’s friend Justin stops by to discuss the yearbook, which she’s not sure she wants to work on this year. Claudia has more questions, and Julia tells Justin she watched a film in health class and is very curious. Claudia asks why Justin doesn’t come by to hang out with Julia anymore. He says Julia’s been busy, then asks her to a movie. Julia says she’s, again, busy.

Bailey meets Will after football practice, complaining about his suspension, which I maintain is totally his fault, so whatever. He thinks that if the team keeps losing, eventually the coach will change his mind, thinking Bailey could turn things around. Charlie, Kirsten, and Owen go grocery shopping, but Kirsten’s mad at Charlie, I guess because of the thing in the last episode. Some random woman thinks they’re married and Owen is their child. They don’t correct her.

The football team wins, so ha ha, Bailey. He’s actually mad about it. Nina and Will tell him it was because of Roger, the team’s new quarterback, who just moved up from JV. In other words, Bailey’s replacement won the game. Kirsten accidentally kicks him while he’s down, mentioning a 19-year-old in a class she’s TAing who seems to have a crush on her. “I take care of babies, Bailey. I don’t date them,” she tells him.

Kirsten ends up at the restaurant, where Charlie’s working; her friend Lisa wanted to try the oysters there. Lisa thinks she should give Charlie another chance. Nina tells Julia she’s dating a new guy; he’s totally the one and they’re totally going to go all the way. Julia pretends she knows what Nina’s talking about. Kirsten sticks around the restaurant while Charlie cleans up. She starts talking about passion, so I guess that’s her way of making a move. She asks him to take her home.

Claudia has more questions for Julia, but they’re about how sex feels, so Julia doesn’t have the answers. Once she’s alone in the bathroom, Julia looks at herself naked in the mirror. At Kirsten’s place, she and Charlie make out, and he thinks it’s going to go farther. He ducks into the bathroom, swigs some mouthwash, and checks to make sure he has a condom. But when he returns, the quite-drunk Kirsten has passed out. Womp womp.

Bailey’s having a bad day at school, which means I’m having a good day. Justin tries to talk to Julia but knows she’d rather talk to Nina. Nina tells her she had sex with her new guy; now Julia doesn’t know how to look at him. She also gets uncomfortable watching them make out. After school Bailey goes to the sporting-goods store where he works and asks for more hours, now that he has extra time.

Charlie teases Kirsten for seemingly forgiving him, since she was willing to possibly sleep with him. They make out some more, but she decides the Salinger house is a bad place for that since it could distract her from taking care of Owen. He invites her to the restaurant, promising he’ll try to get off work early. Then he tells her she reminds him of an angel, so Charlie’s totally getting some tonight. I don’t think Bailey will mind, though, because he now only has eyes for a girl who comes to his store.

Julia starts talking to Kirsten about sex, but Kirsten thinks she should talk to Charlie. Julia says Charlie uses lines on women, sleeps with them, and never calls them again. Unfortunately, one of the lines she uses as an example is the angel line Charlie used on Kirsten. Cue Claudia with more sex questions. Hey, maybe she should talk to Charlie about that stuff. Bailey hits it off with Kate, his shoe store angel, and will most likely be making her his new obsession any minute now.

Julia calls Justin under the pretense of asking about a chemistry assignment, then agrees to go to a movie with him after all. Charlie waits for Kirsten at the restaurant, but he’s been stood up. He confronts her the next morning and she calls him on the angel line. She thinks he just wants to add her to his collection of one-night stands. Charlie tells her he just wanted to say something nice and couldn’t think of anything else. So she’s not an angel after all. I’m confused, but Kirsten wants another date.

Claudia walks by, throwing out a sex fact, and Charlie tells Kirsten he hopes her obsession goes away soon. Kirsten tells him that by ignoring her interest, he’s sending the message that sex is bad. (I think he’s just sending the message that Claudia is being annoying.) Charlie says his current strategy is working just fine. Julia and Nina look at condoms, though Julia won’t admit that she has a plan to use any.

Kate returns her shoes since Bailey sold her mismatched ones to get her back to the store. He asks her out. Charlie asks Julia to talk to Claudia about sex, but Julia tells him to do it. Owen’s sick, which means Charlie and Kirsten might have to postpone their date. Bailey and Kate get coffee and talk about her crazy family. He doesn’t get the chance to tell her that his family is far from normal. Then Kate’s boyfriend picks her up, so Bailey gets sad face again. Also, his coffee is gross.

Julia and Justin see Psycho (how romantic), then make out. He’s surprised since he didn’t think she was interested in him like that. They spot Nina’s new boyfriend with a girl, but she’s not Nina. Kirsten spends the night at the Salingers’, I guess to look after Owen because the others are incapable of doing it. She even takes Bailey’s bed, forcing Bailey and Charlie to share one.

The next day, Will tries to counsel Bailey on his Kate crush, but Bailey just wants to complain about her boyfriend. Claudia encourages him to steal Kate. Will says he’s not that kind of guy, which Bailey somehow finds offensive. His plan is to hang around her a lot until she changes her mind about him. (Bailey, honey, that’s called stalking. Girls don’t find that romantic.)

Owen’s better, so Kirsten and Charlie decide to reschedule their date. Only it’s Charlie’s night to watch Owen. Bailey moves the arrow on the chore chart and makes it his night, letting Charlie and Kirsten know that he knows they’re together. (Charlie talks in his sleep.) He’s moved on anyway, this time to a girl who’s actually his age.

Nina hasn’t heard from her boyfriend, so she thinks he just used her for sex and doesn’t want to be with her anymore. For some reason, Julia doesn’t tell her about the other girl. Bailey tries to get time off of work, which is dumb since he just asked for more hours. He quits, because he’s an idiot. Then he goes to Kate’s school, because he is a stalker.

Julia and Justin do some more making out; then she gives him the “you’re a great guy, but…” speech. Poor Justin is confused and accuses her of pretending to like him back when she didn’t. Back at home, Julia offers to answer any questions Claudia has about sex. Claudia asks if it hurts when a man and woman get together. Julia says that sometimes it does. Charlie and Kirsten are back at Kirsten’s place, and this time they’ve gotten to the part where their clothes are off. So I guess only Charlie gets to be happy.

Thoughts: Kate looks 35. So Bailey definitely has a type.

Kirsten, trust me, the last person a girl wants to talk to about sex is her older brother. And the last person a guy wants to hear talk about sex is his younger sister.

I can’t believe Julia and Nina didn’t run into anyone they knew while they were looking at condoms. I mean, this is TV.

Why doesn’t Kirsten talk to Claudia about sex? She can talk to Julia about it but not Claudia?

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