BH90210 5.7, Who’s Zoomin’ Who?: Smashing Pumpkins (and Faces)

February 5, 2013

BH90210 5.7, Who’s Zoomin’ Who?: Smashing Pumpkins (and Faces)

Nothing says “I dig you” like a gigantic pumpkin

Summary: The After Dark is jumping, and Steve is happy. He tells David his relationship with Valerie is going well, even though they’re moving slowly. The fire marshal makes an appearance and tells Steve he’s exceeded the Peach Pit’s maximum capacity, so he has to shut things down. Now Steve isn’t happy anymore.

The next day Steve promises Nat he’ll pay the fine, but he wants to keep the club going. David suggests that they charge more and let in fewer people. Clare adds that they could get a bigger place – and the rug store next door is going out of business. Nat can’t afford the lease, so Valerie urges him to talk to Dylan (even though she knows he has no money – jerk).

Ray makes a long, picturesque drive to the beach apartment so we can all hear Jamie Walters sing. He takes Donna the biggest and smallest pumpkins of the season, then suggests that they decorate them together that night. Kelly isn’t as charmed as Donna is. Then there’s a lot of exposition: Kelly’s picking up Erin, then spending the night at Brandon’s since Jim and Cindy are going to Palm Springs, which means Ray can come over and hang out with Donna.

At the Peach Pit, Steve and Nat give Dylan their business proposal to take over the rug store and expand. Clare and David are also present, for some reason. Dylan okays the plan, even though it’ll cost $150,000. Jackie tells Kelly she’s been booked for a modeling job, which Kelly isn’t happy about. Apparently Cindy was serious when she said she wanted another baby, because she and Jim are actually making plans in that regard.

Jim gets a fax regarding Dylan’s trust (Dylan hasn’t signed the papers to sever that relationship) and sees that he’s taken out a mortgage on his house. Valerie spills that he’s broke. Mel and Kelly discuss Jackie’s return to modeling, and he tells her that Jackie and Erin are scheduled to take part in a mother/daughter fashion shoot. You can imagine how unexcited Kelly is by that news.

The Walshes figure out that Suzanne took all of Dylan’s money, using Erica to get close to him. Jim’s relieved that they didn’t invest their own money. He decides that he and Cindy shouldn’t go away for the weekend, so that means no sex for Brandon. Jim asks why Valerie’s been spending time with Dylan when they told her to stay away from him. She sticks to her story about him talking to her and trying to kiss her at the Peach Pit rave.

Griffin surprises Donna at the beach apartment, hoping to take her out. (Clare forgot to tell Donna he’d called.) She tries to back out but he wears her down. Donna quickly calls Ray but can’t reach him, so she asks Clare to give him a rain check. She has no idea that Griffin doesn’t plan to bring her home until the next day.

Kelly confronts Jackie over taking Erin to a night modeling shoot, and Jackie brings up all the things the money will pay for (including a car phone, hee). Jackie invites her to stay if she’s so worried that the experience will be damaging to her sister. Griffin flies Donna to Catalina, since apparently he’s a pilot.

Ray shows up at the beach apartment and Clare annoyingly tells him Donna’s out with another guy. Word of Dylan’s financial situation has made it to Nat, who helps Jim ambush him at the Peach Pit. Dylan thinks Jim is pleased with the turn of events because Dylan’s getting what he deserves. Now Jim doesn’t want to help him anymore.

At the beach apartment, David goes looking for a shirt (he got watermelon all over his – don’t ask) and finds handcuffs in Clare’s drawer. He handcuffs himself to the bed, then learns she doesn’t have the key. (She lost it, probably the last time she used them.) Then Chancellor Arnold shows up wanting to see where his daughter lives. Clare covers David with pillows and clothes so it just looks like she has a messy, unmade bed. Then she and her dad go to dinner, leaving David alone.

At dinner, Donna learns for the first time that Griffin plans to spend the night on Catalina. He promises to be a “perfect gentleman” and keep his hands to himself. She notes that a gentleman wouldn’t put her in this position in the first place. (Point for Donna.) Brandon overhears Valerie breaking plans with Steve and suggests that she just dump him if she wants to be with Dylan. She defends Dylan and all his brooding. David’s still stuck in bed when someone he thinks is Clare finally returns. It’s not Clare, it’s Donna (of course).

A hairstylist at the modeling shoot tells Kelly she should be participating, but Jackie probably didn’t ask her because Kelly would overshadow her. Kelly’s just ticked that Erin’s up so late. Jackie’s upset about her interference. Kelly complains that Jackie didn’t invite her to do the shoot with her, even though Jackie didn’t think she would have wanted to do it. David and Donna commiserate over their failed romantic evenings, and he tells her Ray stopped by. Donna realizes that Ray destroyed the pumpkins, so she leaves to talk to him. David’s left alone in bed again.

Valerie goes to see Dylan, who blasts her for telling Jim about his financial issues. She blasts him back for lying to everyone. Dylan says she could have stood up to Jim instead of letting him bully her into telling the truth (which didn’t happen, but whatever). He notes that Brenda got pretty good at standing up to him. Valerie’s finally sick of Dylan talking about Brenda all the time, but he accuses her of pretending to be Brenda so she can have a family. Valerie doesn’t see what’s wrong with that. Dylan feels bad about making her cry.

Brandon never told Kelly that Cindy and Jim were staying in town, so she shows up at the house for sex. Instead of that, she winds up confiding in Cindy about her issues with Jackie. She blames her childhood modeling and Jackie’s pressure to be skinny for her weight issues. Kelly admits that she’s upset that Jackie didn’t ask her to be in the modeling shoot. Cindy reminisces about that other modeling thing where she first met Jackie. She notes that Jackie’s been through a lot since then and has remained sober. Plus, she’s 40 and still looks good.

Donna goes to the pumpkin patch and tells Ray she wishes she’d gone out with him instead of Griffin. He can’t believe she drove all the way out there to apologize, especially after he smashed her pumpkins. He only did that because he cares, “maybe a little too much.” (Donna! Red flag! This is a red flag situation!) Ray promises that he won’t pressure Donna to do anything she’s not comfortable with. They make out.

More apologies: Kelly wants Jackie to know she thinks she’s a much stronger person and a better mother than she was when Kelly was a kid. She’ll keep her mouth shut from now on unless Jackie asks for her opinion. Jackie admits that the photographer wanted Kelly and Erin to both be in the shoot, but she didn’t ask Kelly because she thought people would see Kelly as Erin’s mother and Jackie as Erin’s grandmother. Kelly confides that she thought Jackie didn’t think she was pretty enough for the shoot. Jackie assures her that’s not the case.

David, having freed himself by breaking Clare’s bed, complains to Steve that he could have died since Clare and her father went to dinner and a movie in Monterey while he was handcuffed. They go to Dylan’s to discuss the After Dark, and David spots Valerie in the yard, realizing she spent the night. When Steve sees her, he decides the plan for the club is a no-go. Then he punches Dylan in the face.

Thoughts: What, exactly, does Ray expect Donna to do with a pumpkin the size of a pony?

I don’t know if it’s the same girl playing her as before, but Erin got even more adorable.

Dear Clare: Shut up. Shut up a lot.

Also, why didn’t Clare just take her dad to Donna or Kelly’s room and say it was hers?

Valerie: “You don’t know how intimidating Jim Walsh can be.” Me: “Is there another Jim Walsh I don’t know about?”

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