September 17, 2013

BH90210 6.21, Bleeding Hearts: No Sex and the City

Posted in TV tagged , , , , , , , , , , , at 9:27 pm by Jenn

How shocking that Brandon is the hero here

How shocking that Brandon is the hero here

Summary: Kelly’s supposed to meet Jackie at the Peach Pit, but Colin is about to meet with a dealer to get some cocaine. He reluctantly takes her to the diner, where Brandon and David are telling Jackie about Kelly’s addiction. Valerie and Susan discuss Jonathan and Brandon, so apparently Jonathan is freaking still in town. So is Ginger, and Valerie suggests that they get her to distract Jonathan from Susan. Jackie plans to confront Kelly, but Kelly bails on their lunch date to stick with Colin and meet his dealer, the inexplicably named Danny Five.

Alpha house is having a Valentine’s Day pajama party/sex-out, where people stay abstinent for 24 hours. Steve is on board, which Clare finds hilarious. She tells him she’s not signing the abstinence pledge. Meanwhile, Valerie takes Ginger to meet Jonathan. Clare has a bet going that Steve won’t stick to his pledge, and she plans to make it really difficult for him. (Maybe that’s why she’s slicing a cucumber?) Brandon finds it funny until Susan tells him she’s signing the pledge.

Colin and Kelly are partying with some other people at the loft when Donna brings over Kelly’s mail. She asks Kelly to come home and attend the Alpha party; she should be with her friends. Kelly insists that she’s already with her friends. David kicks off Valentine’s Day by bringing Valerie breakfast in bed (though he still lives in a dorm, so it’s not that great). He wrote her a poem and she got him a friendship bracelet because he’s the first person she’s dated who’s also been a friend.

While Joe and Donna and cutesy, Susan gets roses from Brandon and gives him signed letters from Woodward and Bernstein. Then she gets an even nicer bouquet of roses, and you get one guess as to who sent them. At the loft, everything’s slanted and all the drugs are gone. Colin calls Kelly for being selfish and using all the drugs, though she points out that she’s the one who paid for them. (Well, Bill did, but still.) He tells her that if she wants more, she’ll have to get them herself.

CU’s football coach tells Joe that he’s going to be replaced on the team – they can’t count on him because of his recent medical issues. Kelly goes back to Danny Five and does coke with him while the rest of the gang goes to the pajama party at the After Dark (it’s really just a regular night at the club, just with everyone in PJs). Clare continues to stoke Steve’s fire, and he finally puts on a blindfold so he can’t see how sexy she looks. Jonathan and Ginger show up together, and Valerie immediately thinks Ginger has something up her sleeve.

Kelly and Danny Five do coke and make out until he leaves to deal with another girl doing drugs in the house. Kelly quickly starts to leave, but a guy stops her to demand money for the drugs. She calls for Danny, but the other guy grabs her and forces her onto the couch. Kelly suggests that they drink some wine and calm down. When the bottle’s empty, she smashes it over his head and makes her escape.

The gang is interested in Ginger and Jonathan’s sudden friendship, which is apparently just for show to make the others wonder what they’re up to. Clare’s still messing with Steve’s mind, but he’s practically welcoming it now. Brandon thinks Jonathan’s using Ginger to make Susan jealous, but Susan thinks he’s only there to bug Brandon. It’s not working, since Brandon’s happy that Jonathan has someone else to annoy. Donna’s dateless since Joe’s moping in his dorm room, and she decides to go find him.

During a dance contest, Ginger pretends to hurt her ankle so Jonathan has to find a new partner. Of course, he picks Susan, because when I think of people who enjoy dancing, the first person I think of is Susan. She keeps saying no and he keeps bugging her, so she punches him. Now Brandon’s having a really good night. Ginger’s annoyed at Valerie for fixing her up with a guy who’s in love with someone else, and she threatens to try to poach David.

Nat tells Brandon that Kelly’s in trouble, so he and Susan take off. Valerie takes David to her office and tells him all about her and Ginger’s previous scam and Ginger’s blackmail. David thinks she should give Ginger the $50,000 she wants, but Valerie would rather send him over to sleep with Ginger. Meanwhile, Brandon and Susan find Kelly, who’s really shaken up.

Joe packs his things, telling Donna that he’s leaving school since he can’t play football anymore. She points out that they don’t even know how serious his condition is. She understands why the coach took Joe off the team, but they need to find out if Joe’s actually sick. He’s upset because all he’s ever wanted is to play football. Valerie goes home alone to her little poem.

Steve barely holds it together until the end of the sex-out, then pounces on Clare. She thinks she won the bet since she set the clock back 30 seconds. She’s actually lost, since he’d already set it forward a minute. They get to have sex with each other, so I’m not sure who the real winner and loser are.

Ginger’s preparing to leave town, since she got what she wanted. Val thinks that means she slept with David, but it turns out he told her he wouldn’t have sex with her because he loves Valerie. Ginger didn’t really want to sleep with him; she just wanted to make Val miserable. David can’t put up with Valerie’s shenanigans anymore, so they’re done. He does promise not to tell the rest of the gang about her scam with Ginger, though. He gives back the friendship bracelet.

Kelly spent the night in the hospital with Brandon and Jackie by her side. She wonders how she got to where she is, saying she had everything and has lost it. She tells Brandon she still loves him. He doesn’t respond, but he agrees to stay with her.

Thoughts: This is really weird, but the guy playing Danny Five also played Bobby in “Leading from the Heart.”

I love the idea of Donna hosting a sex-out. “No sex for 24 hours? Well, it’ll be tough, but I think I can pull it off.”

David and Valerie were kind of cute, but there was no chemistry there, so I’m not too broken up about them…well, breaking up.

I’m impressed that Kelly can think on her feet so well when she’s high.

“Happy Valentine’s Day! Can I pimp you out?” Really, Val?

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