June 22, 2014

BH90210 7.28, All That Jazz: Let the Good Times Roll…Then Fizzle Out and Die

Posted in TV tagged , , , , , , at 2:54 pm by Jenn

Five seconds later: "Never mind!"

Five seconds later: “Never mind!”

Summary: Donna’s just finished her final project for her hated fashion class, and David wants to take her to a club to celebrate. The club just happens to be in New Orleans. Donna has to be back the next day to present her project, and David promises that she will be. He’s going to New Orleans to chat with singer Monica’s people before she comes to perform at the After Dark, and he wants to share the trip with Donna. After she says yes, David packs some condoms.

Kelly’s in Brandon’s bed, but there’s nothing sexy going on over there – she’s sick. Brandon thinks she has the Hawaiian flu. She wants to go home, but he wants her to stay so he can tend to her. Steve reminds Brandon that his mom is coming to town for some TV institute’s tribute to her former sitcom. He considers staying at the KEG house so he doesn’t catch what Kelly has. Valerie happens to have the same illness, and she blames Kelly for giving it to her.

Donna’s hated professor isn’t happy with the quality of projects her students have presented so far, and she warns Donna not to slack. This makes Donna worry that she hasn’t put in enough work, since Professor Langley is especially tough on her. David’s like, “Yeah, yeah, that’s rough – let’s get on the plane already.” Steve and Clare prepare to spend time with their parents again; Clare says her father’s very excited to see Samantha. Steve realizes that Samantha hasn’t talked about Chancellor Arnold in a while.

Brandon tends to his patients, who aren’t very sympathetic. The girls are all, “I hope you don’t die. No, seriously.” Steve and Clare find themselves alone at the beach apartment, since one roommate is in New Orleans and the other is at the Walshes’. Clare thinks David and Donna’s trip is romantic and asks Steve why they never do anything like that. He replies that they don’t need to since they have sex.

Chancellor Arnold arrives and reports that Samantha left for the tribute before he could pick her up. He admits to Clare that he read about a hot new star in a soap opera magazine and thinks Samantha might be interested in him. Clare’s more curious about his sudden interest in soap opera magazines. Chancellor Arnold continues that Samantha always seems distance when they talk on the phone. Clare tells Steve that she doesn’t like how his mom is treating her father.

In New Orleans, David reveals that he and Donna will be sharing a bed. She’s totally fine with it. Kelly and Valerie fight as Brandon leaves for the tribute. While Donna and David do typical New Orleans stuff, Samantha speaks at the tribute. Steve tells Brandon that Clare’s giving him a hard time about Samantha’s treatment of Chancellor Arnold, which Brandon points out isn’t Steve’s problem. Steve notes that it could be the chancellor’s fault.

Samantha ditches Chancellor Arnold in favor of networking, and when Clare complains, Steve tells her to grow up. After all, it’s an industry function. Clare can’t believe that he of all people is telling her to grow up. Valerie picks a fight with Kelly, saying she hates her because Kelly kept her from hooking up with Brandon. Flashback! According to Val, Kelly came over to get back together with Brandon, who told her that he was in love with Valerie. Brandon only stopped things with Valerie because Kelly threatened to hurt herself.

Kelly tells Valerie what really happened: She told Brandon she loved him, but that she was willing to let him go so he could be happy, even if it was with Valerie. Val doesn’t believe this version of events, so Kelly tells her to ask Brandon. Chancellor Arnold mopes alone at the tribute while Samantha hangs out with other industry people. Brandon wants to stay there since it keeps him from having to play referee for Kelly and Valerie. But when Clare and Steve start bickering, Brandon changes his mind.

Samantha wants to go to another party, but Chancellor Arnold has finally realized that she doesn’t want to hang out with him, so he tells her to go without him. They bicker about how they live in different worlds and Samantha is kind of horrible and Chancellor Arnold is supposedly embarrassing her. Clare tells Steve to do something, like, shut up already, Clare.

Kelly asks Valerie what happened between her and Brandon after she left the house on the night they were talking about. He said he would call Kelly, but he never did. She imagines that Valerie convinced Brandon that Kelly was going to see Dylan, and he said he was fine with it, since it left him free to hook up with Val. Valerie confirms that Kelly’s imagination is spot-on. Kelly notes that Val said Kelly ruined her big chance with Brandon, so her story can’t be accurate.

Valerie admits that nothing happened, but she’s mad that Kelly keeps rubbing it in. After Kelly left, Val tried desperately to get Brandon into bed, but he resisted. She knows it’s because he sees her as a sister, and because he still loved Kelly. She insists that Brandon’s the love of her life. Kelly points out that she’s said that about a bunch of guys. Valerie accuses Kelly of trying to take away the only family she has left. Kelly thinks it’s weird that Valerie thinks of Brandon as family but also wants to sleep with him – “those two things don’t go together.” This strikes a nerve with Valerie.

In New Orleans, Donna babbles something about the homeowners keeping the outside of their houses looking plain while making everything inside beautiful. Whatever, she’s drunk. In Beverly Hills, Kelly’s either feeling better or just wants to have sex with Brandon because she can. Steve tries to make up with Clare, who’s still mad. He points out that he didn’t do anything. That doesn’t help. How many more episodes until Clare gets out of my life forever?

David starts things up with Donna in their hotel room, but they get no farther than usual. Donna still doesn’t think she’s ready for sex yet. She admits that she’s scared. David is as understanding as usual, though he feels like he needs to prove something to Donna to convince her to go through with it.

The next morning, the two accidentally oversleep, which means Donna might miss her class presentation. Steve tries again to make up with Clare, who still NEEDS TO SHUT UP SO BADLY I CAN’T HANDLE IT ANYMORE. He finally sort of gets her to realize that as much as she feels defensive of her father, he also feels defensive of his mother. Clare whines about not having any other family, which makes Steve wonder who he is to her.

Valerie assures Brandon that she told Kelly that the two of them never hooked up. Then she announces that Kelly applied to grad school at Columbia, so she’ll be going to New York next year. This is news to Brandon. Donna makes it to class, but she’s too late to present. Her professor has no compassion.

At the After Dark, Valerie meets Derrick Driscoll, who wants to follow up on her interest in Kelly’s father’s company. He suggests that she invest in some foreign business ventures that totally don’t sound shady at all. Brandon confronts Kelly about not mentioning Columbia, but she isn’t planning on actually going. She guesses that Valerie read about this in her journal. She can’t live under the same roof as Val, and she wants Brandon to kick her out.

Thoughts: Apparently this was originally going to be the episode where Donna and David had sex, but Aaron Spelling vetoed it on the last rewrite.

People talking about Hurricanes (the drink) in New York makes me feel itchy.

David, sweetie, it’s not about you. Donna’s celibate for Donna, not because you’re inadequate.

Valerie, you’re about to graduate from college and you’re still acting like a 12-year-old. Work on that.

Nothing against Corin Nemec (Derrick), but they probably should have cast someone who doesn’t look like a 15-year-old dressing up in his father’s suit.


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