February 17, 2015
SVU #31, The Truth About Ryan: This Mini-Series Makes Me Want to Drink, Too
Pfffft. This guy ain’t worth it
Summary: Ryan’s ticked because Elizabeth missed their date due to car trouble and wasn’t able to get in touch to let him know. Ryan is now officially off the wagon, which makes him a huge jerk. Like, so jerky that even Elizabeth deserves better. They fight a bunch, and it’s kind of annoying because Elizabeth is totally right but can’t present her argument in a way that doesn’t make me roll my eyes. I think Ryan’s in the same boat there.
Ryan decides he can’t be a lifeguard anymore, since it doesn’t leave him with enough time for drinking. This is actually a good move because a drunk lifeguard is a really, really, really bad lifeguard. He gives his job to Nina, who’s understandably mad because it means a huge increase in responsibility, and she won’t be able to spend as much time with Stu. Elizabeth tries to whine to Nina about Ryan quitting, but Nina awesomely tells her to shut up about how it affects her, since it’s had a much bigger impact on the squad as a whole, and Nina in particular.
Jessica’s been dealing with Ben and Priya’s relationship, and by the way, Ben is a huge jerk. I get Priya being annoying to Jessica, but Ben keeps egging her on and teasing Jessica, and I don’t get why Jess would still want to be with him. Eventually she decides that she wants Ryan instead, which makes much more sense, but she’s hesitant to make a move since he and Liz just broke up. She goes to see him, wearing some of Elizabeth’s clothes, and at first he’s so drunk that he thinks she’s Liz. When he realizes she’s Jess, he’s like, “Awesome, she’s the fun twin anyway.” Elizabeth picks this time to try to talk to Ryan once again, and she finds him making out with her sister.
Nina wants to keep her relationship with Stu a secret, since she made such a big deal about hating all men, but they run into Winston and Wendy at some New Age-y coal-walking event, and it’s pretty obvious that they’re romantically involved. There’s a whole big deal about Nina walking on the coals that goes on way too long. The point is that there’s a woman stalking her because she thinks she and Stu belong together. She shoves Nina, who almost falls on the coals. It’s too dark for anyone to see who she was.
Later, Nina finds her bathing suits shredded, then gets hit over the head and knocked unconscious. She doesn’t remember getting knocked out, so she thinks she just fainted. Then she thinks she sees a baby in the water, but when she jumps in it save it, she can’t find it. When she gets home, someone has left a doll in her room, and she realizes that’s what she saw in the water.
Nina catches Stu trying to hide a letter, and she learns that this mystery woman slept with him once and became obsessed. He couldn’t deal, so he took off on a trip and only came back to the shore just before he met Nina. Her name was Rachel, and Nina thinks he’s talking about troublemaker Rachel Max, but the description Stu gives of his mystery woman doesn’t match that Rachel. It doesn’t matter, though – Nina’s just ticked that he slept with a woman, then ditched her.
After some time apart, Nina decides to talk things over with Stu, who promises that he loves her and hasn’t had anything to do with Rachel since their night together. Then Rachel shows up, and of course it’s Rachel Max. Nina and Stu tell her to go away, but Rachel announces that there’s something that will keep her and Stu connected forever: She’s pregnant.
Wendy wants to divorce Pedro, and Winston’s determined to help them fix things, so he takes Wendy to psychic healers, like a crystal reader, to try to get her to see that she’s making a mistake. But spending all that time with Winston makes Wendy think he’s the one for her. Oops!
Thoughts: In case you were wondering, the twins are still size sixes in college.
Elizabeth makes a brie and tomato sandwich. What kind of college student eats brie? I mean besides Lila and Bruce.
Ryan to Elizabeth: “Your voice hurts my brain.” If these were audiobooks, I would probably say the same thing.
'90s Flashback 
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