April 12, 2015
BH90210 9.6, Confession: Insert “Sophie’s Choice” Joke Here
Summary: Sophie and David are at the Peach Pit, talking about a modeling job Eric told her about. David reminds her that Eric isn’t the best choice of people to tell her about jobs. Valerie rushes in to try to get David to come to Bel Air with her to see something. She gets rid of Sophie by telling her there’s someone in her car. The someone is a repo man, so it looks like Sophie will need to take the modeling job and make some quick money.
Lenny the abusive father goes to court and wins full rights to his daughter, which means Leah can’t avoid him. Kelly snarks at Matt for doing something good for a bad guy. The thing Valerie wants to show David in Bel Air is a mansion; she wants to throw a big party there while she’s supposed to be house-sitting. Leah’s distressed to have to be away from her daughter while Lenny has her. Kelly’s distressed that Lenny’s taking her to a park at a racetrack.
With Brandon gone (woo!), Steve and Janet are left to put together the paper on their own. She pretends to be optimistic that they can handle it. Sophie balks at nudity at her photo shoot, not even changing her mind when the photographer tells her she’ll lose her paycheck. She only agrees to strip when the photographer warns that a bad attitude will lose her jobs. Donna asks Matt to dinner, and he notes that Noah hasn’t been around. She tells him things are complicated and she needs a friend.
Steve thinks becoming a tabloid might be able to save the Beverly Beat. Janet is rightfully skeptical. The After Dark is super-busy, which means Noah gets to keep busy, but he tells someone to keep Donna and Matt out. Kelly and Leah meet with a woman to discuss Leah’s options for keeping her daughter from Lenny. The woman can’t directly help Leah leave, but she can guide her toward the assistance she needs. She warns that Kelly could face legal trouble for helping, since Leah would be violating a custody order.
At the boutique, Donna helps Valerie pick out an outfit for what she’s considering an end-of-the-world party. Val gives herself a five-finger discount. Noah stops by, supposedly looking for Matt, and asks Donna straight out if she and Matt are dating. Instead of answering, she kicks him out. Val can sympathize with Noah, who has two days before he starts court-appointed AA. She thinks they should be reckless, like she’s being with her rave. He invites her to a drag race.
Sophie buys David some CDs to thank him for his advice about the modeling job she claims she didn’t take. He suggests that she wait tables at the Peach Pit until she gets her big break. Steve moves forward with his tabloid idea, though Janet doesn’t like the idea of compromising journalistic integrity to make money. He tries to entice her with the idea of getting to write. Also, she’ll get a raise. Steve suggests that they check out a possibly haunted hotel.
Matt visits the beach apartment to ask Donna to dinner, but she turns him down. She really just wants him to leave so he doesn’t find out Leah’s there while Kelly makes plans to get her out of town. Sophie starts working at the Peach Pit, which she sucks at. A friendly customer leaves her a $100 tip, because he doesn’t yet know that it’s dangerous to enable her. Amazingly, she tries to return it, but the guy tells her to keep it, along with his phone number.
Valerie rides with Noah during the drag race, telling him she’s going to turn herself in for killing her father. She realizes that he’s not the best person to ride with in a dangerous race. Sophie meets the friendly customer, Tom, who invites her to go to Paris with him. Sophie, run away! This guy is super-shady! Donna easily makes up with Matt, then invites him to Valerie’s party. Kelly has trouble helping Leah get a fake ID, but that’s the least of their problems – Lenny knows what they’re up to. As Kelly calls the police, Lenny warns Leah that he’ll never let her go.
Steve and Janet pose as city inspectors to get access to the hotel. Steve pays off a security guy to let them into the kitchen where one of Marilyn Monroe’s alleged lovers may or may not have choked on a chicken bone. Janet accurately pegs the whole thing as a Scooby Doo plot. Sophie tells David that she got a role in a movie, but it shoots in Paris and she’ll have to leave the next day. David’s up for a long-distance relationship.
At Valerie’s big party, Donna tells Matt about the Lenny situation; his solution is for Leah to get a restraining order. Donna asks about fake IDs, so it’s not long before Matt figures out what Kelly’s up to. A neighbor threatens to call the police over the noise at the party, but Valerie isn’t intimidated. She tells Matt she’s turning herself in for her father’s murder. Shaggy and Velma Steve and Janet get themselves locked in a walk-in fridge, because of course they do. They fight a little, then kiss, because of course they do.
Noah gets drunk at the party and asks Donna not to leave him. Matt sees them together and mopes off. The police arrive, and Matt and David urge Valerie to keep her mouth shut. She’d rather go to jail with a clear conscience than keep the secret. But when the opportunity arises, Valerie can’t make the confession. Donna takes Noah to the Walshes’, where I guess he’s living now, and she asks him to take his time in AA seriously.
David thinks Valerie will confess, and he asks Matt if there’s a way they can stop her. Matt says no, so they should find someone who can talk her out of it. Steve and Janet are released from the fridge and deny that anything happened in there. The security guard tells them lots of people get locked in there and have sex. What kind of hotel is this?? Tom takes Sophie on a shopping spree at Donna’s boutique, where David learns what’s really going on. He tells her she’s prostituting herself by going off with a rich guy. He asks her to stay, but she says she can’t.
Valerie goes to the police station, where Abby intercepts her and begs her not to confess. She takes responsibility for Mr. Malone’s death, since she knew what was going on and didn’t stop it. Valerie says that after she shot her father, she watched him die. She hated him, though Abby thinks she loved him, too, and now confuses the two things. She promises that she forgives Val, urging her to forgive herself.
Leah can’t get on a plane without photo ID, so she’s low on options for leaving town. Matt arrives with the news that he knows a forger who can help Leah disappear. Kelly knows Matt could be disbarred for this, but he’s willing to take the risk. Donna has an awkward conversation with Matt, who’s still hurt that she ditched him to help Noah.
Steve and Janet agree that their time in the fridge isn’t worth discussing again. Then they’re stuck in a small place together again when construction makes them think there’s an earthquake. They do some more kissing. Kelly sees Leah and her daughter off, then visits Matt to apologize for the way she saw him before he did something good. Noah goes to an AA meeting, but instead of going inside, he drinks from a flask outside.
Thoughts: ’90s music alert: Natalie Imbruglia’s “Wishing I Was There.” Wait, Natalie Imbruglia had a song other than “Torn”? (Actually, I was familiar with the song; I just didn’t know it was hers.)
No way Brandon wrote every article in every edition of the paper. Or at least there’s no way he did that and still had a social life.
Why is the photographer the only person at Sophie’s shoot? Sketchy!
Seriously, what was the point of having Sophie on the show? I feel like the writers didn’t even know, and had to come up with a fast way to get her out of there before they had to think of an answer. She contributed absolutely nothing.