November 26, 2019

ER 5.4, Vanishing Act: Lucy, You Got Some ‘Splaining to Do

Posted in TV tagged , , , , at 5:02 pm by Jenn

They never warned Mark about this sort of stuff in med school

Summary: Mark is doing a paramedic ridealong with Doris and Morales, accompanying them to the site of a one-car crash. The driver is unconscious and has a very protective, angry German shepherd. Mark distracts the dog while the paramedics try to assess the patient. Mark ends up with dog bites and a tetanus booster. Plus, Weaver teases that if he ends up with rabies, it’s possible no one will notice. She’s trying to have a more casual attitude about not being immediately chosen as the permanent ER chief.

Doug has come in on his day off to get set up for the next day, when the pediatric ER will officially open. Carol tells him that now that he’s an attending, he’ll have to chip in with the other attendings for the nurses’ nights out. I’m sure he’ll love paying for his girlfriend to hang out with people who aren’t him. Doug overhears Carol talking to Lynette about birth control options for a clinic patient, and he recommends a diaphragm, since they work really well. Carol says he might want to rethink that – she’s three days late.

Randi compliments Weaver’s power suit, which she’s wearing for her interview for ER chief. Randi guesses that she copied her whole outfit from a Cosmo article. Elizabeth is back to being an intern and is about to learn which resident she’ll be working with. She guesses she’ll be sidelined to a consultant role. Benton waits until they’re in an elevator to put Reese’s hearing aids on him, making Elizabeth think that he’s delaying telling anyone. Benton says he just ran out of time.

Lucy presents a patient to Carter, a magician who screwed up a trick and inhaled flash powder. He won’t tell them what’s in it, since it’s a trade secret, but Lucy looked it up on the Internet. The magician does a magic trick with a cigarette, and Carter tries to match him by making a blood-gas kit appear out of thin air. The magician impresses Lucy by putting something in her pocket without her knowing. He says it’s not about what people see.

Carol and Doug quietly discuss her possible pregnancy, though she’s pretty sure it’s not a big deal, since she doesn’t feel pregnant. Doug notes that she’s never been pregnant before, so how would she know what it feels like? He goes off to help Jeanie with a patient, but the pediatric ER exam room isn’t ready yet. Lucy and Carter have been using it to stash a corpse, since no one has come from the morgue yet to get it. Chuny asks if the corpse, who she calls Prince Albert, really has a diamond penis piercing she’s heard rumors about. Carter offers to let her look, but Chuny says she’s seen one before.

Elizabeth has the horrible luck of being assigned to Dale Edson. He plans to treat her like he would any other intern, which means giving her all the work he doesn’t want to do. If she finishes in time, she can scrub in to help with surgery (you know, her actual job). On the elevator with Albert, Lucy almost takes a peek to see if the diamond is real. She gets distracted when she leaves to help an elderly man in the hallway. By the time she gets back to the elevator, the doors have closed.

Paramedics bring in a stabbing victim named Bo, who’s accompanied by a cop who’s trying to find out who attacked Bo. The cop thinks Bo will leave the hospital and go seek revenge on his own, but Carol doesn’t want to let the cop stick around and hammer him with questions. Lucy waits for the elevator, but when it returns, Albert is no longer on board.

Mark’s in trouble with some parents whose daughters attended a sleepover at his place. He showed the girls Romeo + Juliet without realizing that it’s PG-13. He tries to get Elizabeth to do a surgical consult, but she’s too busy doing Dale’s scut work to help. She mentions that Dana is undergoing her amputation later that day, and Doug runs off. Mark gets Elizabeth to do his consult, but Dale takes over and sends her to do more boring stuff.

Lucy runs around looking for Albert, then pretends everything’s fine when Carter asks her to see an actual patient. Randi alerts her to the presence of a man looking for Carter. He’s Albert’s brother, Naughton, and he wants to pick up Albert’s personal effects, including some jewelry. Lucy tells him Albert is definitely, no doubt, positively in the morgue. She promises to find him and bring him back up for Naughton.

Doug visits Dana, who reluctantly agreed to the amputation, though she appreciates that Doug helped her get a say in the matter. Mr. Ellis is annoyed to see Doug near his daughter after being told to keep his distance. Lucy goes to the morgue and questions the transport dispatcher, Tony, about Albert’s body. He’s apathetic about his job and gets defensive when he thinks Lucy’s mad that he took too long to get Albert’s body. He makes her panic by pulling a prank to make her think the body was incinerated. Tony says the body was stashed in a closet in the ICU.

Bo wants to leave, but Carol tries to get him to stick around and finish getting stitched up. Then she asks Lynette to call Bo’s mother to come get him. Bo’s 18, but Carol thinks he’ll bolt, so she wants his mother there to stop him. Mark hands a patient off to Jeanie, a man named Mr. Lipson who has minor injuries from a car accident. She notices that his eyes are yellow and guesses he has problems with his liver. He had a transplant a few years ago, and there may be a problem now.

A patient’s mother tries to talk to Jeanie, but she only speaks Spanish and Jeanie can’t understand her. The woman’s cousin, Luisa, hands over the woman’s insurance card, but Jeanie notes that the name on the card is Rosa, while the woman was introduced as Carmen. Jeanie guesses that the card is really Luisa’s, and they’re trying to cover for the fact that Carmen’s son, Angel, isn’t documented. She tells the women that County treats all patients whether or not they have insurance or documentation.

Lucy and Tony go to the ICU to retrieve the body…which isn’t Albert’s. Doug tells Romano that he wants to put Dana on some sort of pain medication that will help rewire her nerves. Doing so would mean pushing back her amputation a few days. Doug doesn’t think Dana’s psychologically ready for the amputation, so this could give her some more time to adjust. Romano doubts that just a few days will make a difference. He tells Dale to let Elizabeth scrub in on the procedure they’re about to do. He and Doug fight about Dana, but Doug ignores him.

Lynette tries to keep Bo in the ER, but his mother hasn’t arrived yet, so he sees no reason to stay. Lynette knows he wants to run off to retaliate against the person who stabbed him. Carol wants to put him on a psych hold, but Lynette’s plan is to sedate him until his mother arrives. Carol overrules her, planning to handle things on her own. Hey, guys, why not just call the cop who was investigating? Carol puts security outside Bo’s room, then tells him they’re waiting for his mom to come.

Romano, Benton, Elizabeth, and Dale operate together, so that room must be all kinds of tense. Dale calls Elizabeth “Lizzie,” and she asks not to be called that. He notes that Romano calls her that. Benton quizzes Dale on some anatomy, then asks Elizabeth to correct him when he answers incorrectly. It’s Romano and Dale vs. Benton and Elizabeth, at least until Dale picks on Elizabeth for something and Romano defends her. However, he then sends her out of the OR to take care of Mark’s patient.

Mark introduces Doug and Weaver to a chief candidate who’s dressed similarly to Weaver. Weaver realizes she’ll need to change up her look to stand out. Jeanie wants Lipson to undergo a liver biopsy to make sure there are no complications from his transplant. He tells her he missed a few checkups, so he hasn’t heard from his regular doctor if there was anything abnormal. He admits that she suspected there was a problem, but he didn’t want to hear the news. Jeanie points out that he can have another transplant if this one has failed.

Kayson tells Jeanie that he examined Angel, who will probably need heart surgery. Carmen is extremely grateful to Jeanie for helping her son. Elizabeth finishes up with Mark’s patient but isn’t allowed to admit him. He tells Jeanie he ran a blood-alcohol test on Lipson as part of his trauma panel, and his level came back .04. Drinking after a liver transplant is a big no-no.

Lucy is no longer panicking over Albert, and is also still pretending everything is okay around Carter. The magician offers her free tickets to his show and does a magic trick with her beeper. She starts to ask him if he’s seen a body, then changes her mind. Lucy spots Naughton and runs away, right into Carol, whose help she needs with an IV. Carol is fed up with Lucy’s incompetence and threatens to tell Carter about her shortcomings if she doesn’t do it first.

Bo has taken off, since the security guard didn’t have permission to keep him there (though Bo didn’t know that). Doug gives Dana the medication Romano said not to, having somehow gotten her parents to agree. Romano is understandably ticked and tells Doug to play John Wayne in the ER, not the surgical floor. All doctors think they’re right; that doesn’t make Doug special. Romano also guesses that Doug gave Dana food, which would have delayed the surgery anyway, and used that window to convince her parents to follow his protocol.

Lucy tries to insert an IV on a little girl, but fails. When she goes to get a small needle, she runs into an impatient Naughton. Just as she’s about to admit that she lost Albert’s body, she spots an arm hanging out from under a sheet on a gurney in the hallway. She pulls off the sheet and reveals Albert like a magic trick. Naughton can’t believe he walked right by him (probably because a workman put some stuff on top of him, so it didn’t look like a gurney at all).

Carol goes looking for a pregnancy test, which is somehow hard to find in the ER. Weaver got a scarf at the gift shop, but Randi disapproves of the way she’s tied it. She advises Weaver to take off her earrings, since they’re throwing her whole outfit off-balance. Doug asks Carol to help Lucy with her IV, since the patient is so young. Carter comes over to defend Lucy’s IV skills, and Doug says he’s setting a new policy with pediatric patients.

Jeanie finds Lipson getting dressed to leave and confronts him for drinking. He claims he only drank once, but Jeanie knows he’s been back on the transplant list for two months. Lipson said he drank to celebrate that his son passed the bar exam. He knew he was rejecting his first transplant, so what’s the harm? He begs Jeanie not to tell UNOS, the transplant service, because drinking will keep him off the list. Without a new liver, Lipson only has about six months to live.

Jerry comes in for his shift and mentions that Randi’s halter top is a little inappropriate for her job. She’s only wearing it because she loaned Weaver her leather jacket for her interview. It looks weird. Mark, Anspaugh, and Kayson all compliment Weaver on her interview, and Mark even says he likes her jacket. Kayson then goes back to the ER to tell Carmen that he can’t operate on Angel because he’s uninsured. His care will cost too much. Jeanie points out that, even though he’s been stable in the ER, he could drop dead once he leaves. Kayson says that a lot of people could drop dead. Let’s hope he’s the first.

Hey, guess who’s back? Bo! He has gunshot wounds this time, plus an angry Carol tending to him and an incompetent Lucy trying to get his blood gas. Carol takes over for her, so Carter tells Lucy to insert an IV. Lucy quietly tells him she can’t – she’s never started one and doesn’t know how. She walks out while the other doctors try to save the patient.

Romano checks in with Elizabeth, who says her first day back as an intern went as she expected. Romano’s impressed that she survived working with Dale. Dale told her to wear a short lab coat, since she’s an intern, but Romano says she can wear a long one. Once Bo has been stabilized, Carol chastises Doris and Morales for not calling ahead about bringing him in. Mark does his liaison thing, siding with Carol while also admitting that they should have been better prepared. Since they treated the patient, they should just move on.

Benton takes Reese to a session with the audiologist, who tells Benton that Reese will have to work hard to develop his language skills. Benton tries to participate with a stuffed animal but feels foolish. The audiologist tells him he needs to step up and come more than twice a week. Lynette tells Carol that even if they’d been able to keep Bo in the ER earlier, he still would have gone out and gotten revenge later.

Lipson leaves without any indication of whether or not Jeanie ratted him out to UNOS. She asks Doug if she can be his full-time physician’s assistant in the pediatric ER. She’s good with kids, and no doubt she won’t come across one who wants her to do something unethical. Doug is on board with the idea but doesn’t think he has any pull with Anspaugh. Thanks to Scott, Jeanie does. And then we get our answer about Lispon, as Jeanie calls UNOS.

Carter finds Lucy on the roof, where she’s moping about being bad at her job. She feels horrible and says she thought she could learn on her own. Carter notes that she put patients in danger, and the number one rule in the ER is that it’s not about the doctors. If Lucy ever lies to him again, she’ll be taken off his rotation.

Doug meets Carol at her house and sees that she’s drinking – she won’t need the pregnancy test he bought her, since she started her period. She jokes that he can save the test for the next time (though she’s not really joking). Doug says they dodged a bullet, and Carol pretends she agrees. They both know how much having a baby would change their lives, but neither is sure if they mean it in a bad way.

Thoughts: Freaking A, Carol, you don’t just casually tell your boyfriend AT WORK that you might be pregnant!

Oh, hey, it’s Kayson. Go crash on a mysterious island with a polar bear, you jerk.

Of course Carter blames Lucy for not being better at something he never taught her to do. Yeah, I know she never told him and she passed off others’ work as hers, but as her teacher, Carter really should have known her skill level.

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