April 12, 2015

BH90210 9.6, Confession: Insert “Sophie’s Choice” Joke Here

Posted in TV tagged , , , , , , , , , at 3:16 pm by Jenn

Heh, Janet wore a shirt that says "I believe" to a ghost hunt

Heh, Janet wore a shirt that says “I believe” to a ghost hunt

Summary: Sophie and David are at the Peach Pit, talking about a modeling job Eric told her about. David reminds her that Eric isn’t the best choice of people to tell her about jobs. Valerie rushes in to try to get David to come to Bel Air with her to see something. She gets rid of Sophie by telling her there’s someone in her car. The someone is a repo man, so it looks like Sophie will need to take the modeling job and make some quick money.

Lenny the abusive father goes to court and wins full rights to his daughter, which means Leah can’t avoid him. Kelly snarks at Matt for doing something good for a bad guy. The thing Valerie wants to show David in Bel Air is a mansion; she wants to throw a big party there while she’s supposed to be house-sitting. Leah’s distressed to have to be away from her daughter while Lenny has her. Kelly’s distressed that Lenny’s taking her to a park at a racetrack.

With Brandon gone (woo!), Steve and Janet are left to put together the paper on their own. She pretends to be optimistic that they can handle it. Sophie balks at nudity at her photo shoot, not even changing her mind when the photographer tells her she’ll lose her paycheck. She only agrees to strip when the photographer warns that a bad attitude will lose her jobs. Donna asks Matt to dinner, and he notes that Noah hasn’t been around. She tells him things are complicated and she needs a friend.

Steve thinks becoming a tabloid might be able to save the Beverly Beat. Janet is rightfully skeptical. The After Dark is super-busy, which means Noah gets to keep busy, but he tells someone to keep Donna and Matt out. Kelly and Leah meet with a woman to discuss Leah’s options for keeping her daughter from Lenny. The woman can’t directly help Leah leave, but she can guide her toward the assistance she needs. She warns that Kelly could face legal trouble for helping, since Leah would be violating a custody order.

At the boutique, Donna helps Valerie pick out an outfit for what she’s considering an end-of-the-world party. Val gives herself a five-finger discount. Noah stops by, supposedly looking for Matt, and asks Donna straight out if she and Matt are dating. Instead of answering, she kicks him out. Val can sympathize with Noah, who has two days before he starts court-appointed AA. She thinks they should be reckless, like she’s being with her rave. He invites her to a drag race.

Sophie buys David some CDs to thank him for his advice about the modeling job she claims she didn’t take. He suggests that she wait tables at the Peach Pit until she gets her big break. Steve moves forward with his tabloid idea, though Janet doesn’t like the idea of compromising journalistic integrity to make money. He tries to entice her with the idea of getting to write. Also, she’ll get a raise. Steve suggests that they check out a possibly haunted hotel.

Matt visits the beach apartment to ask Donna to dinner, but she turns him down. She really just wants him to leave so he doesn’t find out Leah’s there while Kelly makes plans to get her out of town. Sophie starts working at the Peach Pit, which she sucks at. A friendly customer leaves her a $100 tip, because he doesn’t yet know that it’s dangerous to enable her. Amazingly, she tries to return it, but the guy tells her to keep it, along with his phone number.

Valerie rides with Noah during the drag race, telling him she’s going to turn herself in for killing her father. She realizes that he’s not the best person to ride with in a dangerous race. Sophie meets the friendly customer, Tom, who invites her to go to Paris with him. Sophie, run away! This guy is super-shady! Donna easily makes up with Matt, then invites him to Valerie’s party. Kelly has trouble helping Leah get a fake ID, but that’s the least of their problems – Lenny knows what they’re up to. As Kelly calls the police, Lenny warns Leah that he’ll never let her go.

Steve and Janet pose as city inspectors to get access to the hotel. Steve pays off a security guy to let them into the kitchen where one of Marilyn Monroe’s alleged lovers may or may not have choked on a chicken bone. Janet accurately pegs the whole thing as a Scooby Doo plot. Sophie tells David that she got a role in a movie, but it shoots in Paris and she’ll have to leave the next day. David’s up for a long-distance relationship.

At Valerie’s big party, Donna tells Matt about the Lenny situation; his solution is for Leah to get a restraining order. Donna asks about fake IDs, so it’s not long before Matt figures out what Kelly’s up to. A neighbor threatens to call the police over the noise at the party, but Valerie isn’t intimidated. She tells Matt she’s turning herself in for her father’s murder. Shaggy and Velma Steve and Janet get themselves locked in a walk-in fridge, because of course they do. They fight a little, then kiss, because of course they do.

Noah gets drunk at the party and asks Donna not to leave him. Matt sees them together and mopes off. The police arrive, and Matt and David urge Valerie to keep her mouth shut. She’d rather go to jail with a clear conscience than keep the secret. But when the opportunity arises, Valerie can’t make the confession. Donna takes Noah to the Walshes’, where I guess he’s living now, and she asks him to take his time in AA seriously.

David thinks Valerie will confess, and he asks Matt if there’s a way they can stop her. Matt says no, so they should find someone who can talk her out of it. Steve and Janet are released from the fridge and deny that anything happened in there. The security guard tells them lots of people get locked in there and have sex. What kind of hotel is this?? Tom takes Sophie on a shopping spree at Donna’s boutique, where David learns what’s really going on. He tells her she’s prostituting herself by going off with a rich guy. He asks her to stay, but she says she can’t.

Valerie goes to the police station, where Abby intercepts her and begs her not to confess. She takes responsibility for Mr. Malone’s death, since she knew what was going on and didn’t stop it. Valerie says that after she shot her father, she watched him die. She hated him, though Abby thinks she loved him, too, and now confuses the two things. She promises that she forgives Val, urging her to forgive herself.

Leah can’t get on a plane without photo ID, so she’s low on options for leaving town. Matt arrives with the news that he knows a forger who can help Leah disappear. Kelly knows Matt could be disbarred for this, but he’s willing to take the risk. Donna has an awkward conversation with Matt, who’s still hurt that she ditched him to help Noah.

Steve and Janet agree that their time in the fridge isn’t worth discussing again. Then they’re stuck in a small place together again when construction makes them think there’s an earthquake. They do some more kissing. Kelly sees Leah and her daughter off, then visits Matt to apologize for the way she saw him before he did something good. Noah goes to an AA meeting, but instead of going inside, he drinks from a flask outside.

Thoughts: ’90s music alert: Natalie Imbruglia’s “Wishing I Was There.” Wait, Natalie Imbruglia had a song other than “Torn”? (Actually, I was familiar with the song; I just didn’t know it was hers.)

No way Brandon wrote every article in every edition of the paper. Or at least there’s no way he did that and still had a social life.

Why is the photographer the only person at Sophie’s shoot? Sketchy!

Seriously, what was the point of having Sophie on the show? I feel like the writers didn’t even know, and had to come up with a fast way to get her out of there before they had to think of an answer. She contributed absolutely nothing.

April 5, 2015

BH90210 9.5, Brandon Leaves: He Sure Does

Posted in TV tagged , , , , , at 3:18 pm by Jenn

Family love Brandon

I would have gone with “You’re killing me, Brandon”

Summary: Donna’s boutique is opening tomorrow, which is insane, because Brandon’s just getting back from New York, which means it’s only been a couple days since the boutique idea came up. He tells Kelly that he was offered a job in Washington, and he’s going to take it, which means BRANDON IS LEAVING. I repeat: BRANDON IS LEAVING. Party at my place! Valerie asks Matt to represent her in case Abby turns her in for killing her father. She tells Matt the whole story, and he warns that a court might not agree that it was justifiable homicide.

David goes to the Beverly Beat looking for Sophie, who he hasn’t seen for a few days. Janet shows him and Steve posters she’s seen all over town asking where Sophie is. Steve couldn’t care less what happens to her. Noah stops by the boutique, clearly not happy that Matt’s been helping Donna. Donna asks him to be at the opening the next morning. Noah asks her to do something that night, promising that he won’t run away like he has been recently.

Kelly talks to Leah, who went back to the abusive Lenny when she found out she was pregnant. He was great for a while, but recently he became abusive again. Leah filed for divorce and requested full custody, leading Lenny to threaten to kill her. Steve learns from Nat that the Walshes want to sell the house, which means the tenants will have to move out. Steve claims that he was thinking of moving out anyway. He tells Brandon that he thinks Kelly’s moving on from him with Matt.

Valerie corners Abby to ask what she plans to do. Abby’s still considering her options, since she knows that she holds power over Valerie’s fate. Brandon visits the boutique, noting that he and Kelly are both making big life choices without consulting each other. Lenny shows up to warn Kelly to stay away from Leah. After they shoo him away, Kelly tells Brandon to shut up about how they’re making changes.

David finds Sophie and lets her know that someone’s looking for her. Sophie claims that she got a commercial audition off of the fliers; they caught the attention of a casting agent. She asks David to come along. Donna’s hesitant to let Noah spend the night because he’s still not talking to her about his feelings. Then when Noah starts to leave, she asks him to stay. This is the worst relationship. Brandon tries to discuss Lenny and Leah’s case with Matt, who’s surprised that he knows Kelly. Brandon’s more surprised that Kelly never mentioned that they were involved.

Valerie confronts Brandon about his move and how it’ll force her to find a new place to live. Brandon invites her to chat, but she doesn’t want to bug him with her problems. David goes with Sophie to her audition, where she uses her photo from the fliers as her headshot. She pulls her money scam to get herself bumped to the top of the list. David’s annoyed that she’s stepping over people who have put in the work to become actresses.

The boutique is about to open, and Donna’s nervous. Kelly tries to pump her up by talking about it being an adventure. Plus, they did it mostly on their own. Donna’s also worried because Noah is MIA. Kelly tells her that if he keeps pushing her away, eventually Donna will have to let him go. Love might not be enough to salvage their relationship. Noah’s drinking at the After Dark, having just been asked by Felice to lie about how his father died. Valerie compares it to Abby claiming she dumped Carl when it was the other way around.

Sophie grumpily gets some headshots taken after being rejected at the commercial audition. David thinks she lucked out – working jobs beneath you can make you miserable. Also, now she’s free the rest of the day and they can have sex. The photographer invites them to a big Hollywood party the next night. Noah takes Valerie to his parents’ house to show her all the places where his father said he was useless. She talks vaguely about murder, implying that it’s on her list of crimes, but Noah thinks she’s joking.

Brandon tells Kelly he’s doing a story on custody cases, but she knows he just wants to insert himself in Lenny and Leah’s situation. She blasts him for making his departure harder on her. Donna and Kelly throw a party at the boutique, and David becomes the first customer, buying Sophie a dress. Steve tells Sophie that he’s glad she has David to look after her. Matt tells Kelly that he warned Lenny to stay away from the boutique, but she’d rather Matt dump him as a client.

Brandon lurks outside the party, telling Steve how he felt when he started school at West Beverly. He told himself to be cool, but he tripped and embarrassed himself. Donna approached him and introduced herself, then thanked him for putting everyone at ease. Brandon’s grateful that she, Steve, Dylan, and Kelly made him feel so at home. The guys are happy that they had their own business, and now Kelly and Donna have theirs. Brandon announces that he’s turning down the Washington job and staying with the Beverly Beat.

Sophie and David go to the Hollywood party with the photographer, Eric, and David’s mistaken for an actor. He quickly realizes that the director throwing the party makes pornos. David tries to rush Sophie out of the party before she can accept a role. She’s totally willing to do porn, because of course she is. Brandon interviews Leah, addressing the accusations Lenny’s made about adultery (true) and substance abuse (false). Kelly doesn’t get why Brandon’s giving up the job in Washington; she thinks he’s scared.

Sophie still wants the porn role, but David tells her she can do better. She tells him she needs money immediately. He advises her to wait for a better chance. Sophie’s annoyed that she hasn’t become a big star in the past four weeks. Brandon tries to prove to Kelly that he’s not afraid by taking her night swimming. Matt meets up with Donna as she’s leaving the boutique, and she tells him that she’s uncomfortable with him defending Lenny because of her own abusive relationship. He tells her that his parents’ divorce makes him want to give a father the chance to see his child.

Kelly admits to Brandon that she’s scared of the unknown (so night swimming wasn’t really a picnic for her either). He seems afraid of disappearing from her life and being forgotten. Kelly notes that they’re adults and need to grow up. Brandon apologizes for not being a good enough friend to let her move on. She sends him back into the water by himself, and I think it’s a metaphor, because he’s ON HIS OWN, because he’s LEAVING. BRANDON IS LEAVING. WHY IS HE STILL HERE?

Sophie shows David a “where’s Sophie?” billboard – she put out the fliers, and thinks the billboard will get her even more attention. Steve takes Brandon to the Peach Pit for what he thinks is a party celebrating the Beverly Beat‘s first anniversary. It’s actually a goodbye party because everyone wants Brandon to go to Washington. Noah apologizes to Donna for not being at the boutique party, then leaves after she asks him to give something back to their relationship. Kelly still won’t approve of Matt defending Lenny, warning him to protect the baby.

David feels bad that he didn’t tell Steve that he was seeing Sophie. He doesn’t want her to get in the way of their friendship. Steve assures him that they’re good. Abby stops by to tell Valerie that she’s not going to turn her in. It was embarrassing enough for people to know that Mr. Malone killed himself; she can’t face the shame of people knowing what was going on. Valerie’s not surprised that, once again, Abby’s going to keep something quiet. Val just wants closure.

Brandon and Kelly agree that they don’t have any regrets, so he can leave on a high note. Donna tries to call Noah, who’s too busy trashing his father’s things to answer the phone. Donna agrees to have a drink with Matt instead. Brandon gets his parents to agree to let Steve and Valerie stay in the house (and Noah, if he wants). While David broadcasts from the After Dark, talking about how much has happened to the gang, Brandon drives out of our lives forever, woo-hoo!

Thoughts: ‘Bye, Brandon! I will never, ever miss you.

What’s the point of Sophie? She doesn’t add anything to the show. She just makes David look crazy for liking her.

I don’t find Lenny intimidating, partly because he’s roughly the width of a blade of grass and partly because he was Greg in the Brady Bunch movies, and Greg is the opposite of intimidating.

Yes, Abby, people knowing that your husband molested your daughter would be shameful for YOU. Obviously your delicate sensibilities are what we should be worrying about here. Kindly shut up and go away.

March 29, 2015

BH90210 9.4, Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell: Run, Matt! These People Are Crazy!

Posted in TV tagged , , , , , , , , at 1:18 pm by Jenn

"Hi, I'm the new resident hunk. Feel free to leave now"

“Hi, I’m the new resident hunk. Feel free to leave now”

Summary: Kelly’s up late, moping because Brandon hasn’t called from New York. Donna’s also up late, thinking about how Noah’s father’s memorial service is the next day. She’s not sure Noah wants her to be there. They decide to watch TV, which leads to a conversation about how Kelly needs to review her options until she finds something she likes. Guys, I don’t think Donna means TV shows.

Sophie tries to sneak out of David’s house in the middle of the night, as has been her custom for a few nights. She claims she’s still on a waiting list to get a dorm room. She tells David she’s only living at the Walshes’ because Steve invited her, not because she wants to be with him. Donna and Kelly both attend Mr. Hunter’s funeral, where Mrs. Hunter talks about how much her husband loved Noah. Noah can’t bring himself to read his prepared eulogy, so he doesn’t say much of substance.

Sophie and Steve want to publish an article she wrote in the Beverly Beat, but Janet’s skeptical. She and Brandon want to launch a website for the paper. Sophie suggests that they put in a live feed so people can see what goes on in the newsroom every day. Janet thinks that’s dumb, but Steve thinks it’s a great idea. Valerie meets Abby and Carl for lunch, but she’s creeped out because Carl called her while he was on his honeymoon.

Kelly tells Donna that the funeral made her realize that she has no problems or regrets over things that have happened in her life. She wants Donna to put off work and do something fun with her. David helps install a webcam at the Beverly Beat, so Janet was overruled and has to put up with a live feed. David’s surprised to hear that Sophie has been given a column. Steve admits that it’s mostly an excuse to spend time with her. Someone access the live feed, but just to watch Sophie.

Kelly spots a cute guy and makes Donna pretend to read magazines with her so they can stare at him. There’s an empty storefront nearby, and Kelly suggests that Donna lease it and start her own boutique. David broadcasts from the After Dark, taking a request from a guy who’s too nervous to ask out a girl he likes. David offers to call the girl for him.

Abby tells Valerie that Carl wants an annulment, and she thinks Val knows what’s going on. Val just says he’s a jerk. Noah’s been drinking all day, so it’s no surprise when he gets pulled over for driving erratically and is busted for DUI. Sophie’s excited to see her first article in print, but David’s annoyed that she’s using Steve to become successful.

Donna’s hesitant to lease the storefront, while Kelly has a good feeling about her starting a boutique. The cute guy from the day before shows up; he’s a lawyer named Matt, and he has an office in the same shopping area. He offers to give Kelly the names of electricians and other workers the boutique might need, as he has a lot of them as clients. Donna learns that Noah’s been arrested, so it’s convenient that there’s a lawyer right there.

Carl tracks down Valerie at the After Dark to tell her he’s sorry he hurt Abby, but he thought he and Valerie had something. Val regrets doing something so stupid just after promising herself that she would start doing decent things. Janet insists that people will start logging onto the website to read articles and not just look at Sophie. She’s annoyed that Steve just wants to ogle her. Sophie suggests writing an article about David’s new radio show.

Donna takes Matt to court, though he doesn’t have time to talk to Noah before his arraignment. Noah pleads not guilty and is told to return the next day. Matt has lots of ideas for a defense argument, warning Noah of the consequences if he’s found guilty. Noah doesn’t like the idea of being sent to mandatory AA meetings.

Valerie summons Abby to the After Dark to confess that she slept with Carl in Vegas. She fully admits that it was revenge on Abby for not stopping Mr. Malone from molesting her. Then she confesses that she killed her father. Matt goes to the boutique and breaks attorney/client privilege by telling Kelly he’s meeting a client whose wife is divorcing him and suing for custody of their daughter. Kelly finds him familiar, but doesn’t remember that he’s Lenny.

Noah’s mad at Valerie for telling Donna about his arrest. Val doesn’t really care, since she has bigger problems. At the boutique, which is somehow now Donna’s, Donna tells Matt what Noah’s been going through. Matt leaves some of his folders behind, and Kelly finally recognizes Lenny. David sees Sophie and Steve together and interrupts them to ask for advice to give a caller. It’s just a way for him to encourage Sophie to be honest with Steve. Noah, drunk again, goes to the beach apartment to see Donna, but she won’t comfort him until he’s sober.

Sophie summons David to the Beverly Beat in the middle of the night, claiming she wants to interview him for her article. She promises that she doesn’t want to hurt Steve, and that she’ll move out of the Walshes’ house very soon. David tells her he’s done sneaking around, but he’s not against having sex one last time. Sophie puts her shirt over the webcam, but it falls off. Steve’s up late, logs onto the site, and sees them going at it.

Kelly tells Matt that he can’t defend Lenny – he’s a wife-beater. Matt reminds her that the Constitution gives everyone the right to a defense attorney. Steve takes Sophie’s things to David’s house and tells him to let her know she’s being kicked out. He tells both of them that he saw them on the live feed, and David can have her. Sophie doesn’t feel that bad, since Steve just had a crush on her. David busts Sophie on her lies, and she insists that she wasn’t using him.

Valerie asks Abby by the house, but Abby doesn’t want to hear anything from her. She warns Valerie to get a lawyer and turn herself in for killing her father. If she doesn’t, Abby will call the police. In court, Matt tries to argue that the breathalyzer test Noah took wasn’t accurate, but the judge isn’t about to let a drunk driver go free on a technicality. Noah’s fined, sentenced to a year’s probation, and forced to attend 12 AA meetings.

Donna asks to read the eulogy Noah wrote but never delivered. Brandon finally calls Kelly, but she puts him on hold to talk to Matt. He’s a little ticked that she won’t give him a second chance even though she’s still mad about him continuing to defend Lenny. Sophie moves into the Beverly Beat office, so now all the horny men of Beverly Hills can watch her sleep. The magic of the Internet! David advises his lovestruck caller to forget about his crush. Donna reads the eulogy, which talks about how Noah and his father always had a closed door between them.

Thoughts: Just one more episode until we get rid of Brandon! And we got a break from him in this one! I’m beyond excited!

Who would watch a live feed of the Beverly Beat (I mean if Sophie weren’t on it)? Only three people work there, and they never do anything.

I love Janet. More Janet! I demand more Janet!

Where did Donna get the money for the lease? Her parents? That’s pretty much the only possibility.

March 22, 2015

BH90210 9.3, Dealer’s Choice: It’s Sin City, So Why Not Sin?

Posted in TV tagged , , , , , , at 3:04 pm by Jenn

Ick ick ick

Ick ick ick

Summary: It’s morning at the beach apartment, and Kelly remarks to Donna that Noah has spent the night three nights in a row. Yeah, maybe he doesn’t want to be alone after his father killed himself. Donna’s assistant Carrie comes by, followed moments later by Brandon. Kelly thanks him for a recent job recommendation. Noah heads off with Brandon to get his father’s things. Donna tells Kelly that she wishes Noah would move in with her.

Noah asks Brandon to write Mr. Hunter’s obituary; any other writer would write about his successes and skip over the realities of who he was. Brandon says he’s too busy. Noah is horrified to see that his father’s gun is in with his belongings. Valerie is being super-nice to Abby and Carl while they’re in town, buying them theater tickets and having brunch with them. David reminds her that she was originally going to confess to killing her father. Abby announces that she and Carl are getting married in Vegas in a couple days, and they want Val to come along.

Sophie has a new car, a ’65 Mustang, and somehow thinks she’s about to make it big in show business. Steve invites her to the party Donna’s throwing for her parents. Sophie heads to “class” without her books. At the After Dark, Donna learns that Carrie’s been meeting with a client behind her back, pretending to be Donna’s partner. On the plus side, her dealings have been very successful. Noah shows up with Mr. Hunter’s gun, showing it off to Donna by firing it in the air. She predicts that he’s going to fall apart pretty soon.

While Steve chases after Sophie to give her her books, Brandon meets with Mrs. Hunter, having decided to write the obituary after all. Mrs. Hunter says that her husband worked for a company he hated and money he didn’t care about. He was miserable because he wasn’t able to spend more time with his family. When the company collapsed, so did he. Mr. Hunter always wanted to be an artist, but gave it up for business.

Sophie meets David at a coffee shop and gives him some suggestions for his new radio gig. Steve sees them together and realizes that they’re more than friends. At the Walshes’, Valerie asks Carl to zip up her dress. He’s uncomfortable since he’s practically her father, but she says she’s used to having an affectionate father. Holy crap, Valerie. Kelly arrives to return Brandon’s phone, and learns about the Vegas trip. She’s annoyed to see that Brandon has thrown her stuff in a box. After answering Brandon’s phone and hearing a woman’s voice, Kelly begs Val to let her tag along to Vegas.

Brandon visits Victor on his boat to basically say that his father was justified in killing himself. Noah plays with the gun, wondering why Mr. Hunter should shoot himself in the head instead of the heart. He thinks his father made a selfish decision. Brandon’s sure Mr. Hunter loved him, though. Steve sees Sophie off to “class,” pretending he has a date with an actress at the same coffee shop where he saw her and David. Sophie lies that she’s never been there, then says she ran into David there.

In Vegas, Kelly picks roulette numbers based on the number of letters in “cheater” and “Susie” (the name of the woman on the phone). Valerie rolls her eyes at how affectionate Abby and Carl are. While Abby heads to bed, a guy named Henry hits on Kelly. Donna helps Noah pack up the boat, but he doesn’t appreciate her assistance. He laments the hours he spends thinking about his father after Mr. Hunter spent so much time ignoring him. He tells Donna he’ll live in his office for now.

Brandon asks Janet to put Mr. Hunter’s obituary on page 3, but she says it doesn’t fit since she cut some things out. She and Steve don’t think that people will care enough about Mr. Hunter’s life for them to put the obit on page 3. Brandon thinks it’s a cautionary tale about doing what you want with your life and not settling for average. Janet and Steve aren’t moved. Carl and Valerie people-watch together, and after a while, she kisses him. He pushes her away just before Abby can catch them.

Noah sticks to the bar at Donna’s party, which is for her parents’ anniversary. Steve confronts David for spending time with Sophie after insisting they’re just friends. Dr. Martin introduces Brandon to Lou Jessup, a reporter from the New York Chronicle who claims to read the Beverly Beat. Brandon calls his bluff. A drunk Noah raises a toast to the Martins (he calls Felice “Felicia”), then says that he and Donna will half a bunch of guests at their own wedding, but everyone at the party will be dead by then. “To the Martians!” he toasts.

The next day, David calls Noah “the toastmaster” and fills in his memory. He tells Sophie they need to stop whatever they have going on to spare Steve’s feelings. Donna goes to see her client and catches Carrie there; she’s already been hired. Donna notes that she was hired for a lower rate but isn’t capable of doing the work. Carrie taunts that the client said she was better than Donna.

Steve continues to refuse to put Mr. Hunter’s obit on page 3, despite Brandon’s protests that now he has no legacy. Steve thinks he’s bitter that he doesn’t have a great job like Jessup. Brandon says everyone wants what they can’t have – after all, Steve wants Sophie. Steve encourages Brandon to get Jessup to see how good he is.

Noah apologizes to Donna for ruining the party, but she doesn’t accept. He says her father has already forgiven him. She’s annoyed that Noah won’t let her help him through his grief. Instead, he comforts her when he learns that Carrie stole her client. David broadcasts a live set from the After Dark, where Brandon, Janet, and Steve celebrate that Brandon got a meeting with Jessup. Sophie tries to convince David that he’s doing a good job. He tries to resist her flirting.

In Vegas, a similar scene is playing out, with Carl trying to resist Valerie’s flirting. Kelly’s hanging out with Henry again, thinking she’s doing a good job forgetting her problems. Just as Henry rolls double sixes, his hoped-for roll, Kelly sees a bride. Carl has failed to resist Val, and has wound up in her bed. Kelly sees him leaving the room, then finds Valerie half-naked inside. Kelly announces that she’s leaving first thing in the morning. Val has the good grace to feel bad about what happened.

In the wedding chapel the next day, things are going fine until Valerie fumbles the rings, having touched Carl’s hand. Valerie actually feels bad that she slept with her new stepfather. Carrie goes to the beach apartment to tell Donna that the client hated all of her ideas. She apologizes, but Donna shoots back, “Why do people think it’s okay to act horribly as long as you feel badly about it afterwards?” She doesn’t think Carrie actually feels bad anyway. The client calls Donna to take her back, but she declines.

Brandon meets with Jessup, surprised to learn that Jessup is trying to impress him. He wants Brandon to know that the Chronicle is considering Brandon for a job at their L.A. branch. Donna finally tells Noah straight out that she wants him to move in with her. Noah tells her that if she wants to help him, she needs to leave him alone. He shows her his father’s suicide note, which apologizes for not spending more time with his family, especially Noah.

Kelly heads back to the Walshes’ house and asks Brandon about the woman on the phone. Brandon tells her it wasn’t his phone. Womp womp. Brandon promises that he’s not dating anyone. Kelly calls him on putting all her stuff in a box, but he says he needed to get rid of the things that reminded him he was alone. Kelly says she tried to forget about him, and it makes her sad that she almost succeeded. Steve drops by David’s house looking for Sophie, who went out late the night before. David says she’s not there, but she is. She wonders if Steve has figured things out.

Thoughts: Why would Kelly voluntarily spend the weekend with someone she hates?

Carrie’s little butterfly hair clips earn her the award for most ’90s style this week.

Valerie to Henry, re: Kelly: “By the way, she doesn’t blow on dice.” Was that…was that a…?”

March 15, 2015

BH90210 9.2, Budget Cuts: In Case You Hadn’t Figured It Out Already, Noah and His Dad Are the New Dylan and Jack

Posted in TV tagged , , , , , at 3:11 pm by Jenn

Thanks a lot, Abby, for making me feel sorry for Valerie

Thanks a lot, Abby, for making me feel sorry for Valerie

Summary: Just seconds into the episode, Kelly learns why it’s called “Budget Cuts” – the foundation that funds the clinic is cutting its funding, and some people’s jobs are in danger. Kelly’s on the list to lose her job if the clinic doesn’t make some changes. At the Walshes’ house, David tries to convince Valerie that her claim that she murdered her father isn’t quite accurate. He was molesting her, after all, so she killed him in self-defense. Val has asked her mother to come to town so they can talk, and Abby actually shows up, with a man named Carl by her side.

Donna encourages Noah to reach out to his family now that they’ve lost all their money. Noah thinks they have money stashed somewhere and will be fine. Speaking of money, Steve offers to help Sophie pay for her books for school. She shoos him away, then goes to cash in her student loan, getting herself $5,000. Kelly asks Brandon to drum up some publicity for the clinic so they can stay open longer than the next few weeks. There’s going to be an auction, and of course, the whole gang will help organize it and/or attend.

Sophie runs into David downtown, and he notes that she’s buying some expensive things while telling Steve she can’t afford a place to live. She asks him for a tour of Beverly Hills. Valerie hangs out with Abby and Carl, annoyed that she hasn’t had time to talk to her mother alone. Carl believes that Mr. Malone was killed in a car accident. When they’re alone, Abby tells Val that she can’t admit that he killed himself because Carl would ask questions. She blames herself for her husband’s death. Abby reveals that she and Carl are engaged, and she sees this as a fresh start.

Sophie pulls David into a con to pretend they’re staying in a hotel just so they can get access to the pool. Noah goes to his father’s office to offer help, but Mr. Hunter says it’s too late. Kelly reads over Brandon’s article on the clinic, lamenting how many people will lose medical care if it closes. She wants them to keep their distance while they’re working together. Then she kisses him, so that didn’t last long. Brandon puts on his confused face.

Steve’s disappointed that he and Sophie haven’t hooked up yet. She tells him she spent the previous night looking for a waitressing job. He wants to go on a date, but she tells him she’s still dealing with her feelings for an ex. Kelly contacts a reporter from the L.A. Chronicle to do Brandon’s article so the two of them don’t have to spend time together. Then she considers auctioning off her wedding dress to raise money for the clinic. Sophie tries to get David to keep his mouth shut about the two of them spending time together so Steve doesn’t find out. David doesn’t see the point.

Mr. Hunter comes by the After Dark to try to make up with Noah. At the Beverly Beat, Steve asks Janet to decipher things Sophie has said to him. She informs him that Sophie’s never going to sleep with him. The Chronicle reporter Kelly comes by to get Brandon’s notes, then asks if Kelly’s single. He admits that the story isn’t going to make any difference. Noah’s father tries to act like a good father, reminiscing about playing baseball with Noah when he was a kid and getting him a signed Reggie Jackson ball.

Valerie gets Abby alone and tries to talk about her father’s abuse. Abby doesn’t want to talk about it. Val reveals that her father blackmailed her to keep her quiet, telling her that Abby would be mad if she found out. She now knows that she did nothing wrong. As Valerie implies that she killed her father, Abby slaps her, blasting her for threatening to go to the police. Val is shocked to realize that Abby knew about the abuse but didn’t do anything. Abby insists that her husband was getting help. She doesn’t understand why he killed himself.

The auction starts, and Sophie wonders who’s modeling the wedding dress. Donna tells her they’re just displaying it. Brandon tells Kelly that he won’t give the Chronicle reporter his notes because the guy isn’t going to take the article seriously. Sophie thinks Kelly should get revenge by modeling the wedding dress. Steve and David talk about Sophie while she models, but David decides to stay quiet about their developing relationship.

Carl tries to reach out to Valerie, who’s been mean to him the whole time he’s been in town. He thinks she just has a problem with cops. He admits to killing a former classmate in self-defense while investigating a break-in. Valerie thinks Carl was in the wrong, but Carl says that the robber was the one who committed the crime. Someone from a radio station happens to be at the auction and tells David that there might be a job for him. Oh, great, back to radio stuff.

Kelly models the wedding dress, but instead of bidding on the dress, people start bidding on dinner with her. Brandon shuts it down by bidding $1,000. Noah tries to convince his father to walk away from his failed business and move on. Mr. Hunter is back to being a bad father and doesn’t want his support, even now that Noah has listed his boat for sale. Noah gets mad and knocks over Mr. Hunter’s martini, which he says was the only thing he had left to look forward to. Noah stomps off, and moments later, there’s a gunshot. ‘Bye, Mr. Hunter!

Valerie tells David that her mother knew what her father was doing to her. David advises her to forget Abby and take care of herself. She needs professional help, since David can’t understand what she’s going through. Val thinks talking to Carl is all the help she needs. The Chronicle article has convinced the foundation to keep funding the clinic, but the staff will still need to be reduced. Kelly offers to give up her job, saying she needs to move on anyway.

Sophie meets David at his house, where he tells her he got a tryout for a job at the radio station. He’s disappointed in himself for lying to Steve about the real nature of that relationship. I’m not sure what that nature is, but they kiss, so I guess they’re dating? Brandon wound up giving the reporter his notes after all, so Kelly thanks him for supporting her. He asks her to finish up their auction date with dessert, but Kelly doesn’t think it’s a good idea. They’re starting to accept that they’re really over.

Abby lets Valerie know she’s leaving town, so Val goes over to say goodbye. Abby admits that she confronted Mr. Malone about his abuse; he lied, then said he’d get help. Valerie thinks they need to spend more time together to get past the damage. Donna finds Noah at a park, playing baseball by himself and drinking alcohol he took from his father’s office. He hits a homerun with the Reggie Jackson baseball, saying he wanted it his whole life.

Thoughts: Carl is played by the same actor who played Joe’s brother Hank. He was also the UPS guy in Legally Blonde. I love that guy!

So to sum up: The only good parents on this show are Jim, Cindy, Dr. Martin, Mel (sometimes), and Samantha (sometimes). No wonder these people are so screwed up.

I’m confused about the specifics of Valerie’s storyline. I was under the impression that the abuse happened when she was a child. But she killed him right before she came to Beverly Hills, when she was 18 or 19, right? Was he still molesting her then? Also, unless she plotted out his murder beforehand, there’s no way the police could have mistaken a heat-of-the-moment shooting for suicide. The plot just doesn’t hang together.

David is a horrible MC/auctioneer. Steve should have done it.

January 11, 2015

BH90210 8.25, Aunt Bea’s Pickles: Jill and Ted’s Excellent Misadventure

Posted in TV tagged , , , , , at 3:19 pm by Jenn

I love Kelly's "I don't want to be related to Valerie" face

I love Kelly’s “I don’t want to be related to Valerie” face

Summary: It’s Valerie’s birthday, and the gang is throwing her a surprise party at David’s house. David’s the only one who got her a present, so Kelly suggests that they say it’s from all of them. Donna arrives with a dress she made Valerie, and mentions that she finished all the dresses the boutique ordered. Kelly’s a little concerned over how much she’s working. Bill and Abby arrive for the party just ahead of David and Valerie, then hijack the festivities by announcing their engagement. Steve terrifies Kelly and Valerie by mentioning that they’ll be sisters.

The next day, Donna hangs around the boutique, MayaLee, so she can see who’s buying her clothes. A woman returns one of the dresses, having thought she was buying a Donna Karan dress. Valerie tells David that she and Kelly are getting together to plot how to stop Bill and Abby’s wedding. She mentions how much she hates her birthday because her family always had to pretend they were happy. She also didn’t like that her mother always gave her a charm for her charm bracelet. Unfortunately, that’s what David got her.

Janet wants to stay at work even though she’s sick; otherwise she won’t get paid. Steve has tracked down Ted but is worried that Jill will choose him over Steve. Brandon makes his day worse by admitting that he has a job interview with another paper, the Chronicle. Kelly and Val get together at the Peach Pit, and realize that their parents gave them matching necklaces. Valerie tells Kelly to be completely honest with Abby about what Bill is like. Kelly’s reluctant to go too far, but realizes that it’s necessary to prevent becoming Valerie’s stepsister.

Steve goes to see Jill so he can tell her how to get in contact with Ted. He still wants another chance with her, but Jill is focused on meeting Ted. He manages to convince her to go on one more date with him before he hands over Ted’s information. Brandon has a successful job interview and is immediately offered the position at the Chronicle. On his way out, he runs into a guy named Brian who was also just hired. They then encounter a guy who announces that he and his fellow reporters are going on strike. Brandon and Brian are scabs.

Donna learns that MayaLee sold all of her dresses, so they’ll need to buy more from her. She considers using the money to open her own store. Noah cautions her not to take risks just yet. Janet got a parking ticket while picking up Steve’s suit from the dry cleaner’s, so she tells him to pay the ticket. Steve has to admit to Brandon that he needs the suit for a date with Jill. The guys realize that Janet doesn’t appreciate having to do their personal errands.

The discussion turns to the reporters’ strike, which, as Janet points out, means that Brandon took someone else’s job. Brandon defends his actions by saying he waited a long time for the job. Steve thinks he should take it if it’s the break he wants, but Janet disagrees. Valerie and Bill meet at the Peach Pit, where Val orders Bill to find someone else to sucker. She wants him to take Kelly’s feelings into consideration. She threatens to call his parole officer or file false charges if he hurts Abby.

Meanwhile, Kelly has Abby over to the beach apartment to tell her what a horrible husband and father Bill has been. Abby thinks he’s changed. They’ll be getting married on Saturday. Brandon and Brian go to their first day of work, but only Brian crosses the picket line. Steve and Jill’s date doesn’t go well, and she doesn’t make it any better for him by telling him she still wants to give things with Ted a try. He gives her Ted’s work address. Jill asks Steve to arrange a meeting for them.

Donna spots a letter from MayaLee in Noah’s things and opens it, finding an invoice for the dresses. She’s confused because they’ve already been paid for. Noah has to admit that he paid the boutique to buy her dresses. Janet complains to Brandon and Steve that she’s annoyed at being overworked and underpaid, especially while she’s sick. They don’t really care. Steve has called in a potential replacement for Brandon, but he’s no longer needed, since Brandon wouldn’t cross the picket line at the Chronicle. Steve considers using him for another job.

Brian calls Brandon to tell him about a big story he’s covering. He needs help with the research and wants Brandon’s expertise. Valerie complains to David about her and Kelly’s failure to break up Bill and Abby. David realizes that she’s actually upset about her father. Val confesses that he sexually abused her when she was a child. Not long after, her mother invited a bunch of people over for her surprise 13th birthday party, which is why Val doesn’t like surprise parties.

While Noah tries to make things up to Donna, Brandon and Steve go to the Chronicle and wonder what the reporters are striking for. This time Brandon crosses the picket line, telling Steve to go ahead and give away his job at the Beverly Beat. Valerie, David, and Kelly go to a church for Bill and Abby’s wedding rehearsal, which Bill is late for. Valerie’s starting to feel that Abby was right about Bill having changed.

Steve takes Jill to a bar to meet Ted, who he’s asked Don (Brandon’s possible replacement) to pose as. Steve tells Don that he’s testing Jill to see if she would still love Don if he weren’t as hot as she expected. Don questions Steve’s real feelings for Jill if he’s willing to upset her. Steve tosses out the plan and introduces Jill to the real Ted. Donna spots her dresses in Noah’s office and realizes that he bought all of them.

One of the striking reporters, McCourt, goes to the Beverly Beat to school Brandon on unions. “Take the story; don’t take the job,” he says. Brandon’s like, “But I struggled for a whole six months to get a good job! Forget about how I’ve won an award and everyone loves me and I’m destined for greatness! I’m only 22 – it’s not like I’m getting any younger!” Bill shows up at the beach apartment on the morning of his wedding, telling Kelly he’s not going to go through with it. Kelly’s fed up with his broken promises.

Everyone else gathers at the church, which Noah thinks is a good place to have a conversation with Donna about why he did what he did. She asks him to support her but not lie to her. Noah tells her that a department store wants to sell her dresses, and this time he had nothing to do with the deal. Brandon can’t believe that Steve got Janet to buy his wedding present. Brandon’s not going to keep the job at the Chronicle: “Best job I never had. I’m really proud of the work I didn’t do there.” He’ll go back to the Beverly Beat if Steve gives Janet a medical plan. Steve has to agree.

Kelly goes to the church to tell Abby that Bill won’t be coming. Abby wants to act like she’s fine, but Valerie’s sick of her doing that. She notes that people don’t know how to help if they don’t know anything’s wrong. At home that night, Kelly praises Brandon for making good decisions, unlike her father. Jill comes by to tell Steve that he was all she talked about with Ted. Now she likes Steve, not Ted. Valerie wants to focus on her happy memories, and she gets to create a new one when David makes her a birthday cake.

Thoughts: What happened to Brandon and Steve publishing together for years, like Brandon said in the last episode? Suddenly he wants a new job? Wouldn’t he talk to Steve about it ahead of time? Whatever happened to two weeks’ notice.

Jill, I know Steve can be charming, but it’s okay to say no to him. Otherwise, his ego will be bigger than Beverly Hills.

But kudos for saying no to someone with Ted’s haircut. You deserve better.

Steve’s also going to give Janet a raise for basically being his personal assistant, right?

The sound on the version of this episode I watched wasn’t very good, so I have no idea why it was called “Aunt Bea’s Pickles.” It should have been called “Bill Is Still a Jerk.”

January 4, 2015

BH90210 8.24, The Nature of Nurture: Beware Gay People and Their Horrific Agenda to Be Parents and Give Your Child a Loving Home

Posted in TV tagged , , , , , , at 3:08 pm by Jenn

Monsters, right?

Monsters, right?

Summary: Donna meets Noah at the Peach Pit, where she opts for caffeine instead of the pills she’s no longer taking. She’s frustrated that she can’t find another job. Also frustrated: Kelly, who hasn’t yet been approved as a foster mother for Leanne’s baby. Instead, the baby has been placed with a couple who have named him Raphael. Kelly’s disappointed that the foster parents can apply for custody and eventually adopt Raphael. She’s also disappointed that they’re gay. Brandon wants to write about them, of course. Kelly’s unsure of their ability to raise a child.

Brandon gets to work right away, discussing with Janet how weird it is that people consider it controversial for gay couples to adopt. (It’s no less controversial 17 years in the future, guys.) Brandon notices that Steve is taking some cost-cutting measures. Steve admits that without a big advertiser, they may not be able to keep publishing. He’d like to publish cigarette ads. Brandon outright refuses to advertise a product that kills people.

Valerie and David go to the airport to pick up Abby, who’s decided to visit in the wake of Valerie’s recent trauma. Val is really, really not happy to see her mother. Noah encourages Donna to make her own clothes since she can’t find a designer to make them for her. He’s willing to cover all the costs, too. Donna’s hesitant but can’t really say no to a fully funded chance to make her dreams come true.

Kelly calls the social worker to complain about the gay couple, Kyle and Gene, being allowed to take care of a child. The social worker assures her that they went through all the same verifications as straight couples, and were cleared to be caregivers. The phone call ends when Bill suddenly shows up. He was let out of prison early for good behavior, and wants to start working on his relationship with Kelly. She’s eager to do the same.

Steve goes out with Jill, having to make up stuff about the people Ted wrote her about. (Hilariously, he says that he and “his” brother, Sam, went hunting, which is a miracle because Sam was in a wheelchair. Jane is taking the news well, and Jill hopes she and Sam can patch things up, because “it was a crime of passion.” I want to meet Ted’s family!) Steve has to scramble to keep Jill from finding out his real name from his credit card.

David meets his new neighbor, who likes to play his music loud. David recognizes him as Woody Sloan, but Woody doesn’t appreciate being recognized. Brandon learns that Steve went behind his back to work on a deal for cigarette ads. He puts a halt to the deal, then asks Kelly if she thinks he should give in to save the Beverly Beat. She thinks he should stand up for what he believes. Brandon segues to her disagreement with the social worker, admitting that he doesn’t think Kelly should get Raphael.

Donna gets right to work on making her clothes, telling Noah that they should set some ground rules so working together doesn’t get complicated. If they disagree on something, it won’t get done. She’d also like his opinion on her designs. Noah’s worried that this is too much for Donna to handle while she’s recovering from taking the pills. She assures him that everything is awesome and this is a great arrangement and there will be rainbows and puppies in their future.

Valerie continues to resist connecting with Abby, which David thinks is ridiculous. They listen to Woody play, and David tells Val that ten years ago, he was a Grammy winner with a huge contract. He’s not sure where things went wrong. Valerie wonders why Woody still plays when David doesn’t. David’s sure that Woody isn’t playing just for the joy of it. He blasts Valerie for acting like there’s something he needs to get over.

Steve confronts Brandon for halting the ad deal, which keeps them in financial trouble. Brandon has a hard time taking Steve seriously when he’s currently lying to his girlfriend. Steve promises that he’s going to tell Jill the truth. Brandon doesn’t think it matters if he’s already sleeping with her. There’s more fighting across town when Bill shows up at the After Dark. Val yells at him a little, then introduces him to Abby. The two parents are immediately taken with each other.

Jill invites Steve to her hotel room, where she wants to enact the fantasies he once told her about in a letter. Steve quickly gets uncomfortable when Jill keeps saying Ted’s name. He ducks out before there’s any sex. Brandon asks Kelly what she thought of his article; she didn’t like it since he sided with Kyle and Gene. She doesn’t like that Raphael will be raised without a mother. Brandon wonders if she would feel the same about the arrangement if Kyle and Gene were lesbians. Just as they’re sort of patching things up, Leanne arrives and begs Kelly to help her get her son back.

After a day of failed pitches to stores, Donna asks Nat to take a look at her designs and state his opinions. He has no idea what to say, which makes sense, because he’s not in fashion. (Also, she used spring colors and he’s an autumn.) Donna thinks this proves that she’s never going to be a successful designer. Noah thinks their last meeting will go well. He tries to get Donna to take her mind off of work, but that fails.

Kelly takes Leanne to meet with the social worker; she’s happy that Leanne wants the baby back, because one ill-equipped teenage mother trumps two stable, nurturing, mature fathers. Leanne is even less of a fan of gay parents than Kelly, and Kelly ends up defending Kyle and Gene a little. Apparently Leanne found out about the arrangement from Brandon’s article. She objects to her son (who she’s named Eric) being “raised gay.” Kelly says that people are born gay, not raised that way. She also realizes that someone who left her baby on a doorstep is probably not the best judge of what’s right for him.

Steve talks about the Jill situation with Janet, who’s already figured out that he got uncomfortable about which guy Jill wants to be with. Brandon confronts Steve about the ads, and Steve points out that they both have the financial problem, not just him. He knows that Brandon will move on if the Beverly Beat closes, while Steve will struggle to find something else. Brandon isn’t making as big a deal out of the situation as Steve thinks he should be.

The next time Woody plays his guitar, David starts playing his keyboard, and the guys have an impromptu jam session. Meanwhile, Steve goes to tell Jill who he is – or, more accurately, who he isn’t. She’s disturbed that he read her intimate letters to someone else. Steve thinks they could have a great relationship, but Jill disagrees. Noah secretly makes arrangements with a boutique to pay for anything necessary if the boutique will sell Donna’s designs.

David goes to the Walshes’ to happily tell Valerie that he started playing music again. Her good mood over the news is quickly ruined when she learns that Abby and Bill are going on a date. Kyle’s upset to learn that Leanne is back in the picture and can take Raphael/Eric back. Brandon apologizes for the fact that his article caused the upheaval. Kyle and Gene are unwilling to fight Leanne since they might ultimately have to give the baby up anyway, and it would be even more painful after they’ve raised him for a few years.

At some later point, Brandon’s up for some award, and Steve’s not happy for him. Kelly admits that she doesn’t think Leanne will be a better parent than Kyle and Gene…and she doesn’t think she would be better either. She also didn’t object to Gene and Kyle as parents because they’re gay – she objected because she wanted the baby for herself. Abby and Bill show up to announce that they’re dating. Kelly’s as unhappy about the relationship as Valerie is.

Noah’s deal with the boutique is a success, and Donna has no idea how it came about. I’m sure there’s no way this will come back to bite anyone. Kelly goes to Leanne’s to see how things are going, but Leanne isn’t happy to see her. Uh, she got you your kid back, girlie. Show some gratitude. Kelly tells her that Kyle and Gene would have been great parents. Now Leanne is stuck with a baby she doesn’t know how to take care of, and no help from her mother. She insists that she loves the baby, but Kelly thinks she made the wrong decision.

Brandon doesn’t win the award, and he and Steve aren’t talking, and Kelly’s late arriving, so the Beverly Beat‘s table at the ceremony is pretty dreary. Then Steve is called up to presents a surprise award to Brandon. He says he tried to explain to Brandon what a difference his stories make, but Brandon wouldn’t listen. (Whatever. Brandon loves hearing that stuff about himself.) Brandon tells Steve that they’ll be publishing their paper far into the future, which I guess means they’ll be running cigarette ads.

David visits Woody, who’s grateful for their jam session since it helped him finish a song he was working on. He wants to know what happened to David after his sudden (and brief) success. Woody plans to just play their song for the enjoyment of music, not to gain fame or fortune. David uses it to get Valerie to calm down and stop freaking out about how Abby and Bill are going away together for the weekend.

Steve goes back to Jill, arguing that they’re meant to be together. He wants her to be happy, and he’s figured out the way to do it: He’s going to find Ted so he and Jill can be together. Kyle and Gene show up at the Walshes’ with Raphael, having been asked to foster a child they didn’t even know was him. Kelly and Brandon are happy for them.

Thoughts: I was going to say, I didn’t buy Kelly being homophobic. I appreciate the show trying to tackle a subject like this, but it didn’t fit that Kelly would have anything against a gay couple.

If this series took place ten years later, Donna could go on Project Runway.

Nooooo, Noah! You were doing so well as a good guy!

I can’t believe I’m on Valerie’s side about anything. Abby’s a jerk for going out with someone she knows her daughter has problems with. (Eh, Abby’s a jerk in general.)

April 13, 2014

BH90210 7.20, With This Ring: Isn’t Anyone On This Show Happy?

Posted in movies tagged , , , , , , , , , , at 2:53 pm by Jenn

Apparently the jeweler is Jason Priestley in makeup. Freaky

Apparently the jeweler is Jason Priestley in makeup. Freaky

Summary: Valerie has a dream that’s a mixture of her father and being in bed with Tom. She wakes up when Tom starts bleeding on top of her. Real Tom tells her that they’ll have to “face it all” when Abby returns from her business trip. Kelly writes in her journal on the beach, admitting to feeling alone. She chose herself instead of deciding between Brandon and Dylan; now they’re seeing other people and she’s single.

Brandon runs a production meeting at CUTV, but Tracy’s not paying attention. She’s not happy that he held on to the engagement ring he wanted to give Kelly. Brandon wants the conversation to wait until after the show. Donna talks to Clare about her David/Cliff issues; she wants to date Cliff but doesn’t want to take him places David might show up. She’s tired of people seeing her and David as always together, and would like to live her own life.

Ryan asks Steve for advice about taking a girl out. Steve suggests a double date with him and Clare at a pier carnival. Abby returns from her trip, and Valerie admits that she’s surprised to see her. She still won’t sign the papers for the second mortgage on the house. Abby decides to go back to Buffalo the next day.

That night, there’s a special CUTV program, where Chancellor Arnold presents Brandon with a plaque commemorating the station’s 100th broadcast. It’s followed by a party, which Clare, Steve, Donna, and Cliff ditch to go out. Tom urges Valerie to talk to her mother about her issues, but Val resists. Kelly and Brandon make awkward small talk, which Tracy sees, and she blasts Brandon for talking to his ex when they’d planned to have their big conversation.

The party ditchers go to the carnival, and Donna enjoys her time with Cliff. Steve wonders where David fits into things. Clare points out that David hangs out with Chloe all the time. Ryan’s date is going well, and he asks Steve for a condom. The girl’s parents are going out of town, and he wants to be ready for some alone time the next night.

Tracy and Brandon finally have it out, with her accusing him of cheating with Kelly. He assures her he’s not, but when she asks if he still loves Kelly, he doesn’t know what to say. Tracy’s done with him. Cliff tries to turn things romantic with Donna, but she resists since she’s kind of still with David. She doesn’t think she should be playing around with Cliff. Cliff replies that he’s not playing.

David’s hanging out with Chloe, who thinks Donna’s cheating and tells David to get out before he gets hurt. David’s sure that nothing like that is going on since Donna’s a virgin. He wants to respect her decision to send time with someone else. Valerie has another nightmare, this one about her father coming to tell her a story to help her fall asleep: “Once upon a time, there was a little girl who loved her daddy very much. She made her father do all kinds of terrible things.”

Valerie immediately goes to Abby’s hotel for the talk she’s been putting off having with her. She can’t believe Abby was always able to sleep through everything Mr. Malone did to Valerie: She was molested. Abby doesn’t believe her; she and her husband were married for 20 years, so she would have known if he was a molester. Valerie says that Abby could have stopped him. Abby slaps her and tells her to go to Hell, but Val says she’s been there since she was 11.

Kelly wonders why she and Brandon aren’t together if there were truly meant to be. Donna tells her that she still loves David, but she has feelings for Cliff and thinks thing are easier with him. Kelly brings up what I did about how Brandon was with Emily when Kelly was in the fire, and how David was with Chloe when Donna was being held hostage. Donna urges Kelly to tell Brandon how she feels. Kelly points out that they’ve dated other people since they broke up, so they seem to have moved on. If she has to talk to Brandon, Donna has to talk to David.

Clare wants Steve to talk to Ryan about sex instead of just handing over a condom. Steve doesn’t think Clare is the best source for sex education, considering how she handcuffed herself to Brandon’s bed as a teen. Clare decides to initiate the sex talk herself. Brandon talks to Nat about Kelly, saying that she knows how he feels, since he proposed. If she wants to be with him, she knows where to find him.

Abby goes by the After Dark to talk to Tom, and he reveals that he knew Valerie was being molested. Now Abby gets that the accusations are true. Valerie shows up and explains why she never told anyone about the molestation: She thought she’d get into trouble. Plus, Mr. Malone told her that Abby wanted it to happen. Valerie reveals that she only said something because Tom threatened to go to the police. She confronted her father, and he responded by killing himself. Now she feels responsible for her father’s death.

Tracy goes to the beach apartment to tell Kelly that she and Brandon broke up because she found the ring. Tracy wanted to tell Kelly that she’s backing down, and Kelly and Brandon can be together again, but she wants him back. Kelly admits that she still loves him. Tracy’s upset that Kelly gave up her chance and now wants Brandon again. Steve approaches the sex talk with Ryan, but it turns out he doesn’t really need it. He’s relieved to hear that it’s okay if he wants to wait a little while. Kelly comes by to see Brandon, but Steve tells her he left to return the ring.

Chloe gets invited to New York to meet with Luther Vandross’ manager, and she asks David to come along. David doesn’t want to leave Donna back in Beverly Hills, and he definitely doesn’t want to hook up with Chloe and her top that is definitely just a bra. Donna shows up for a talk, and David sends Chloe out of the room but she doesn’t stay out of sight. She comes in with her jacket undone, looking like she was just getting dressed.

As Abby’s packing to return to Buffalo, Valerie arrives to tell her she’ll sign the papers. Now, though, Abby wants to sell the house, knowing what was going on without her knowledge. She feels horrible that she didn’t know what Valerie was going through. The jeweler Brandon bought the ring from two years ago remembers him (whatever) and asks if he wants cash or an exchange. Brandon considers swapping it for a bracelet, but he wants to make sure he and Kelly are really over first.

Outside the store, Brandon runs into Kelly and tells her about returning the ring. She claims to be happy about that decision. She doesn’t think they should get back together. Brandon pretends to agree. At the After Dark, Valerie tells Tom that she wants to leave the past in the past, but looking at him makes her think of her father. She loves him, but she can’t be with him right now. Brandon gives Tracy the bracelet, having returned the ring after all. He has no idea that Kelly bought it.

Thoughts: Why are we suddenly back to Brandon and Kelly? Where did that come from?

I like Tracy, but she needs to calm down. And not just because Brandon’s nowhere near worth it.

They sure waited a long time for the Valerie reveal. I wonder if the molestation storyline was planned all along?

Girl with Ryan, what’s wrong with you?

Chloe doesn’t see what Donna sees in Cliff. Poor girl – she’s blind.

Clare, I’m 99 percent sure Ryan doesn’t want to have the sex talk with his brother’s girlfriend.

April 6, 2014

BH90210 7.19, My Funny Valentine: Love the One You’re Not With

Posted in TV tagged , , , , , , , , , , , at 2:54 pm by Jenn

I wonder if Valerie has a reflection...

I wonder if Valerie has a reflection…

Summary: Kelly wants to start her and Tom’s first Valentine’s Day together with a jog. He’s not as peppy as she is. Valerie calls, so now Kelly isn’t very peppy either. Val tells Tom that she needs him to meet her at the After Dark right away – her mother’s coming in today. Kelly warns Tom that he’s being used, but he considers this enough of an emergency that he needs to ditch her for Valerie. Val then asks Brandon and Tracy to pick her mother up at the airport so she doesn’t have to be alone with her.

Tracy reminds Brandon that it’s Valentine’s Day and asks what he’s getting her. Apparently a Luther Vandross concert at the After Dark isn’t enough. Donna’s been skipping classes since her trauma with Evan, so Clare tries to cheer her up with a trip to the salon. David arrives with Valentine’s Day goodies, and Donna tries to act cheerful. Dick offers Steve some pot before they play golf together, which is the weirdest combination I’ve ever heard of.

At the After Dark, Valerie complains about her mother visiting. She thinks Abby blames her for her father’s death. As Brandon drives Abby home from the airport, she says that she knows Valerie believes Abby blames her. At the After Dark, David and Chloe meet Luther Vandross (Chloe’s opening for him), who’s giving the concert because he owes Mel a favor.

At the beat apartment, Clare again tries to convince Donna to go to the concert. Suddenly there’s something to make Donna want to put some clothes on and fix herself up a little: Cliff has returned! He wants to spend Valentine’s Day with her. Donna and Cliff go for a walk, and she tells him she has a boyfriend. He says that as long as they’re not on the road to marriage, he still has a shot to win her back.

Brandon takes Abby to the After Dark, which Valerie isn’t happy about. (But when is she happy about anything?) She thinks her mother has an ulterior motive. “Like mother, like daughter,” Brandon says. She calls her mother tough and manipulative, which is exactly how people see Val. Valerie says that’s because of Abby. At the beach apartment, Kelly complains to Clare about Valerie summoning Tom away. She still insists she’s not using him.

David stops by to see Donna, who’s out with Cliff. Kelly and Clare cover for her, but Donna and Cliff arrive as he’s leaving. David’s mad that after days of trying to cheer Donna up, she’s suddenly all better now that Cliff’s there. Cliff promises that he didn’t know Donna had a boyfriend. After he leaves, Donna tells David that she hasn’t been in touch with Cliff for months. David chooses to leave in a snit instead of be happy that she’s better.

At the Walshes’, Abby asks for a fresh start with Valerie, then immediately asks her to sign so she can take out a second mortgage on the family house (which Val owns half off). Valerie’s mad that she just came to town for money. She tells Abby to sell it, but Abby wants to keep it. Valerie would rather see the house burned to the ground – she hates it and she hates her mother for not stopping whatever happened there.

Everyone gathers at the After Dark for the concert. Steve offers Clare some pot, but she wonders why he would think she would be interested. She gives it back to Dick in front of his date, who was under the impression that he’d quit smoking. Clare doesn’t want to hang out with anyone who’s high. Kelly meets up with Tom, who promises that they’ll spend Valentine’s Day together. David and Donna smooth things over.

Brandon and Tracy take Abby to the concert, assuring her that she and Valerie will work things out. Steve goes outside to chat with Dick while he smokes, and gives in to peer pressure. Chloe gives a boring performance, and Donna complains to Kelly about all the time David’s been spending with her. Kelly teases that they should call Cliff to join them tonight.

Valerie picks another fight with Abby, who doesn’t understand why there’s so much animosity. She’s leaving the next morning for a convention, but when she returns in a week, she wants to sit down with Val and work things out. Valerie refuses, saying Abby won’t win her over. Luther performs and all the couples share a moment, except Clare and Steve, since she can tell he’s been smoking.

In the bathroom, Kelly runs into Valerie and notices that she’s not having a very good night. Val says she hopes Kelly and Tom are happy together, but Kelly needs to know something. Tom is the only person who’s ever really loved Valerie. If Kelly really wants to be with him, fine, but if not, she should let him go so he and Valerie can be together, since she really needs him right now. Kelly can tell that Val is being sincere.

Luther sings more. Clare’s mad at Steve. David tells Donna that he’s glad she’s doing better, but he wonders if she tried to get him to leave that morning because she knew Cliff was coming by. Donna assures him again that she hasn’t spoken to Cliff in months. When Chloe pops up, Donna storms off. This is clearly a healthy relationship.

Kelly tells Tom that she’s changed her mind about spending Valentine’s Day with him. She’s not in love with him, but Valerie is. Kelly says she went out with Tom to make Valerie jealous, and though she did eventually develop feelings for him, things didn’t start out right, so she doesn’t think they should stay together.

Donny, Kelly, and Clare go to the Peach Pit for pie and griping about guys. Cliff’s there and asks Donna to go out with him the next night. Donna accepts, so in your face, David. Tom tells Valerie that he and Kelly broke up, then dances with her. He tells her that over the years, he’s tried to get over her, but it’s never worked. There’s kissing.

Brandon tells Tracy that he has a present for her, then leaves to get a drink of water, telling to grab a shirt since it’s cold. She pulls a shirt out of his dresser and finds a ring. Brandon returns with champagne, and that combined with the ring gives Tracy the understandable thought that he’s proposing. Little does she know that the ring is the one he offered to Kelly. Tracy quickly figures that out, so…that’s awkward.

Thoughts: I guess David’s allowed to hang out with Chloe all he wants but Donna’s not allowed to hang out with Cliff? Shut up, David.

Luther Vandross is way too high-class for this show.

Stoned Steve can’t be much different from regular Steve, right?

I would never advocate drug use, but if there’s anyone who could benefit from the mellowing effect of pot, it’s Clare.