August 30, 2014
Party of Five 5.8, Love and War: No Rest for the Wicked
Summary: Charlie’s trying to get Diana to sleep by singing “Hush, Little Baby,” but he can’t remember the words. (“If that mockingbird don’t mock…”) He and Daphne are tired but happy. Then Owen ruins it by loudly reminding Charlie that they’re supposed to go fishing. Claudia calls to talk to Charlie, but he blows her off for the fishing trip. Griffin’s like, “I have no life, so if you ever want to talk, just call me. I’m sure no one will think it’s weird if you call your family and ask to talk to your sister’s ex.”
Owen thinks Charlie’s bored because he keeps yawning. They actually catch a fish, so I’m impressed. Joe’s coming to town, so Julia tells Ned she’s heading home for a family dinner, which means she won’t be meeting his family on parents’ weekend. Ned tells her they’re not coming anyway, so he’s made some plans for a weekend on his own, seeing John Woo movies and writing a paper.
At the restaurant, Bailey has to turn down an employee’s cousin for a job because his immigration documents aren’t in order yet. Then he gets a visit from Sean Sullivan, a successful restaurateur who’s thinking of opening a place right across the street. Charlie and Owen come home with a bunch of fish, which they’ll be having for dinner. While Charlie’s out of the room for a few seconds, Owen attempts to clean the fish with dish soap, so there goes dinner. Bailey brings home food instead, telling Julia and Sarah about his possible competition.
Joe thinks Diana looks just like the woman she was named after. He invites Griffin to join everyone for dinner, not realizing how awkward that is for him and Julia. Griffin inadvertently reveals that Ned was lying about his movie plans, since the retrospective isn’t for another week. Bailey decides he’s going to go toe-to-toe with Sullivan and shut him down. He’s seriously the only person there who thinks this is a big deal, since no one else will shut up about it.
Julia goes back to school to confront Ned for lying to her. It turns out his family’s in town after all, and they know all about Julia. Julia’s surprised to hear that Ned has a brother named Richie, and that Richie usually has an attendant. He appears to have autism. Claudia calls Charlie to tell him she doesn’t think boarding school is going to work out. He tells her to suck it up and stay put. Claudia then learns that due to some immature behavior by the boys at her school (a panty raid? Really?), everyone’s now under an 8 p.m. curfew and can’t leave campus. The girls are warned not to retaliate.
Owen tries to interest Charlie in another brother/brother activity, but he’s on Diana duty, so she has to come along. Bailey visits another restaurant to try to get the owner to hire a chef Sullivan is interested in. The owner is impressed with how proactive Bailey’s being. Owen wants to see a movie, but Charlie doesn’t think they’d be very popular if they brought an infant into a movie theater. Owen complains that Diana’s stupid and nothing’s fair anymore.
Sullivan goes by the restaurant to tell Bailey that he knows Bailey’s trying to make him lose his chef and the space across the street. Bailey tries very hard not to seem intimidated. Ned apologizes to Julia for lying about his weekend plans and not letting her meet his family. She thinks he’s ashamed of Richie. Ned says he’s not; he didn’t want Julia to meet his parents because they don’t get along. Julia convinces him to let her spend time with them.
Claudia and one of her friends set off a smoke bomb in the boys’ dorm, because the show has run out of interesting plots for Claudia to have. Owen tells Charlie that he didn’t mean the things he said about Diana. Charlie assures him that he understands how Owen’s feeling, but Diana needs things done quickly, while Owen’s old enough to wait. He asks Owen to help him out.
Bailey gets a surprise visit from someone at the Department of Alcoholic Beverage Control. He never should have told Sullivan he was only 20, because now he’s in trouble for serving alcohol while he’s underage. Claudia left evidence of her identity behind when she set off the smoke bomb, so now she expects to be expelled. Obviously, she would welcome it. Unfortunately for her, the person who busted her is Mr. Kroop, who has a soft spot for her.
Julia has dinner with the Graysons, who tell her they like her a lot more than they liked Maggie. Things quickly disintegrate – Dr. Grayson is disappointed that Ned doesn’t want to be a surgeon like everyone else in his family. It’s very Griffin and his father. Bailey goes by one of Sullivan’s restaurants to call a truce, then changes his mind when he spots the illegal employee he wouldn’t hire. At the house, Charlie and Daphne fight over whose turn it is to soothe Diana, but Owen beats them to it.
Ned complains to Julia about his father, thinking Dr. Grayson is hard on him because he’s the only child who’s capable of living up to the doctor’s high expectations. He seems to admit that one of the reasons he stayed with Maggie so long is because his parents didn’t like her. Ned managed to get into Stanford, but he’s not doing as well as his father would have liked. Julia wonders what he gets out of not succeeding. Ned’s jealous that his parents love Richie unconditionally.
Charlie tries to make plans with Owen, who’s bitter that Charlie always has other things to do. Julia meets up with the Graysons before they leave; they love her and are happy Ned’s dating her. Bailey tells Joe that Sullivan can’t get the space across the street from Salinger’s because he’s being investigated by Immigration. Joe knows Bailey engineered the situation and blasts him for ruining other people’s lives. He and Mr. Salinger would have never pulled this sort of trick. Bailey doesn’t feel guilty at all, since he didn’t do anything illegal, and he’s benefiting.
Claudia calls Griffin and tells him she doesn’t feel like her school is the right place for her. All she thinks about is her family. Charlie talks to Daphne about how his parents managed to spend time with all five of their kids. He wants to go talk to Owen about his feelings, but Charlie’s more interested in sleeping right now. Julia thinks Ned’s going to break up with her to protest how much his family likes her. He thinks she wants to save him, but she’s not sure he’s worth it. He asks her not to give up on him.
Thoughts: This episode’s guest stars are all of the ’90s-sitcom variety. Sullivan is played by Anthony Tyler Quinn (Boy Meets World). Dr. Grayson is played by Daniel von Burgen (Seinfeld, Malcolm in the Middle). Mrs. Grayson is played by Christina Pickles (Friends).
Panty raids? At school? Aren’t those a camp thing?
Charlie, Claudia warned you about Owen’s sibling rivalry. You need to start listening to her.
Was Lacey Chabert doing something else during this part of the season? So far, the kid who plays Owen has gotten more screentime.
I hope Charlie feels good about that nap when Owen starts biting people and shoplifting.