January 31, 2015

Party of Five 6.5, The Shortest Distance: The Road to Ruin

Posted in TV tagged , , , , , , , at 1:30 pm by Jenn

This is the only road trip I want to be a part of

This is the only road trip I want to be a part of

Summary: Griffin and Will are in the Salingers’ house while Julia and Claudia are discussing the fact that Sarah isn’t coming back from New York. They’re super-nice to Bailey, who says they’re not breaking up and will visit each other. No one has the heart to tell him that that won’t last. Over at Charlie and Kirsten’s, Kirsten, who’s started fertility treatments, tries to boost Charlie’s fertility with bacon and frozen boxer shorts. She expositions that Charlie took a second job to pay for the treatments. Charlie objects to some of her treatment ideas, but can’t say no to having sex twice a day.

It looks like Claudia and Cameron are secretly seeing each other, making out in a storage room at school. She feels bad about dating her friend’s ex. Cameron notes that the only alternatives are telling Alexa about them or breaking up, so if they want to stay together, they need to keep it quiet. He’s sure that Alexa will find another boyfriend quickly. Julia goes to Evan’s office to give him a chapter, but really to make sure they’re okay after their kiss. He’s practically forgotten about it. She seems to want more, but he knows it’s a horrible idea, since he’s her publisher.

Myra thanks Charlie for helping her study, which he won’t have time to do anymore, now that he has a second job. He suggests that she work with Claudia, but Myra’s hesitant since they’re so different. Later, Charlie goes to his second job (something with furniture) and manages to get some extra hours. Bailey visits Will at his office to invite him on a road trip – he and Griffin are driving Sarah’s things to her in New York. He reminds Will that he encouraged Bailey to be more spontaneous and crazy.

Evan has problems with Julia’s latest chapter, giving the critique that they can’t let readers know that she and Ned made up after a fight by having sex. Julia thinks he’s uncomfortable thinking about her having sex with another man. Bailey, Will, and Griffin’s road trip is really boring because Bailey’s a control freak. He’s trying to get to New York in two days, in time for his and Sarah’s anniversary. Will and Griffin aren’t as concerned with making good time, especially if it means fewer bathroom breaks.

Claudia tutors Myra, who makes fun of Alexa for being dumped by a stupid guy. (To be fair, Alexa is acting super-pathetic.) Evan spots Julia at a gym during a workout and can barely keep his clothes on. Claudia goes to Cameron’s house to talk to him, but the conversation is interrupted when she learns that his mom has a guy come over whenever Cameron’s dad works late. Claudia feels bad for her poor widdle boyfriend and doesn’t tell him how badly Alexa’s doing.

Charlie and Kirsten are scheduled to have sex (how romantic), but the fertility drugs’ side effects combined with her meds turn her off. The guys’ moving van breaks down, stranding them at least overnight. Bailey’s determined to get to New York by his anniversary no matter what they have to do. He admits that Sarah doesn’t know he’s coming to visit. Griffin points out that she might not even be there when they arrive. Bailey says he’s making a big gesture so Sarah can’t turn him down – he thinks he’s going to get her to come home.

Daphne finds Kirsten’s medical stuff and asks Charlie if they’re trying to conceive. Hey, guess whose business that isn’t? Right, yours! Go away, Daphne. She’s supportive, or at least pretends she is, and says she got a job. The guys can’t get the van back on the road for a couple days, and Bailey doesn’t take the news well. He knows his chances of getting Sarah back are slim, but he doesn’t know what else to do. Evan and Julia go to a publishing panel; she makes it weird by correcting his presentation of her. Yeah, they should definitely be in a relationship.

Claudia sits with Myra at lunch, though Myra doesn’t really want to socialize with her. She reveals that she found little notes from Cameron in Claudia’s math book, and she’s figured out that they’re seeing each other behind Alexa’s back. Evan chastises Julia for hijacking the panel, since he needed to present her in a specific way to make sure she gets the right publicity. Julia, however, feels like she’s been enlightened by the experience, or something. Charlie gets home late from his second job too tired for scheduled sex. He admits that he almost stayed at work instead of coming home to do something that’s supposed to be fun.

Griffin and Will tell Bailey that they may take a bus home and let Bailey continue the trip on his own. Bailey notes that Will told him to take risks and now doesn’t want to support those risks. Will says Bailey’s still being controlling and isn’t able to handle change. Bailey doesn’t think Griffin and Will have any right to give relationship advice, since they ditched their significant others once they either went back to school or got pregnant. He’s just trying to keep Sarah from walking away. Will tries to get him to see that Sarah’s already gone.

Later, Will and Griffin change their minds and decide to stick to the plan. Bailey, however, has been looking over the route and has realized that there’s a lot of distance still between him and Sarah. And guys, I don’t think he just means physical distance. I think it’s a metaphor. Back in San Francisco, Daphne asks Victor to watch Diana so she can go look for the job she told Charlie she already had. Then she suggests that she sublet Victor’s apartment, since he’s always at the Salingers’ anyway.

Claudia finally tells Cameron that they can’t see each other if it means Alexa suffers. She sees it as choosing herself instead of choosing Alexa over Cameron. She’s never been the kind of person she is right now. Even if it means she’s alone forever, she can’t be with someone if it makes her feel bad about herself.

While Charlie’s at the fertility clinic to give a sperm sample, Kirsten shows up to make things romantic so they don’t feel like they’re just completely a task. Either Julia and Evan spent the night together or he’s in her room before she’s out of bed. He admits that he was worried that they made a mistake, but he feels too good for that. Instead of continuing the trip, Bailey ships Sarah’s things to her and heads home with Will and Griffin.

Thoughts: How much of this episode’s budget was spent on chokers?

Why are Charlie and Kirsten scheduling sex anyway? They’re newlyweds. This is a bad sign.

Yeah, Claudia. You’re going to be alone forever. Girl, you’re 17 and you were with the guy for, like, two weeks. Chill.

’90s music alert: Dave Matthews’ Band’s “Crush.” Good news, guys – I can still recognize it within three seconds of hearing it.

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